


Song of Healing

by CompletelyDifferent



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Corruption, F/F, Family, Gem Fusion, Hurt/Comfort, Memory Loss, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-13
Updated: 2016-11-22
Packaged: 2018-08-14 20:52:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 26,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8028532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CompletelyDifferent/pseuds/CompletelyDifferent
Summary: Sapphire is lost. Ruby is falling apart. To save them both, everyone must come together.





	1. Sacrifice

Things go wrong on missions. Usually Garnet saw them coming.

Not always. Not that time.

xxxx

The Citadel of Sounds.

“That’s a pretty name,” Steven said, when the mission was first explained. “Was it like a concert hall?”

“In a sense,” said Pearl, unusually evasive.

“Once,” said Garnet.

xxxx

The truth of the matter was that the war had consumed all of Gem-kind on Earth. No place went untouched. No place had stayed peaceful. Even the Lunar Sea Spire, built as a place of relaxation and contemplation, became just another war base, in the end.

The Citadel of Sounds had started as a concert hall, but it had not ended as one.

xxxx

Past the main entrance way— a beautiful hall carved from alabaster, with graceful murals and slender columns— the Crystal Gems came to a hallway which lead down many branching paths. The group decided to split up: it would take far too long to explore, otherwise.

Pearl went with Amethyst. The two bickered and joked as they headed towards an empty auditorium, falling into familiar stride.

Peridot and Lapis headed off into what could have been considered a storeroom, if it wasn’t so big. Open, airy and nicely organised, it was more like a museum than anything. On display were instruments— things which resembled guitars, violins, drums, flutes, harps, but all with strange sizes and names. Peridot prodded and poked, amazed that Homeworld had ever had such things. Lapis was quiet. Homeworld had changed in many ways, and the death of music was one of them.

Garnet and Steven went together. They went past the front rooms, the parlours, the pretty fronts for guests, into the Citadel’s backstage. Cramped, plain corridors. Dust on the floor. A series of small workrooms, for composing, reversing, building instruments.

They came to a door. Through it was a medium sized chamber. Aside from a door on the opposite wall, its walls were bare. There was no furniture, no instruments, nothing.

“What’s it for?” asked Steven.

“Don’t know,” said Garnet. Her Future Vision was oddly blank.

“It might be booby trapped,” suggested Steven. 

Garnet nodded, and summoned her gauntlets. Steven didn’t need to be told— he summoned his shield. The two stepped into the empty chamber. 

The door slammed shut behind them. Neither were particularly surprised. Instantly closing doors were a standard dungeon feature.

What _was_ surprising was the music.

It wasn’t exactly music, but it wasn’t noise, either. It was low, almost beyond the range of hearing, more felt than heard. Steven frowned. It grated in his bones, in his teeth, in some nameless part of himself. It seemed to grow louder, the tone drilling into him, and even when he covered his ears, it didn’t do anything to block the sound out.

“Garnet?” he began, but then he stopped. Garnet couldn’t answer. Her whole body was glowing, _pulsing_ with light. Steven reached out to her— but before he could, she split apart. A very disgruntled Ruby and Sapphire tumbled to the ground.

“ _What_ ,” said Steven.

“That _noise,_ ” growled Ruby. “It pulled us apart!”

“Anti-fusion feature,” said Sapphire.

The strange song was still present, but quieter, more subdued now. Ruby and Sapphire tried a fusion dance— the most elaborate Steven had ever seen from them. They spinned, twirled, and dipped, their gems began to glow— but when they embraced, Sapphire pulling Ruby close, nothing happened. 

Ruby grunted in frustration. Slowly, sadly, Sapphire stepped away.

Steven rubbed his arms. They were covered in goosebumps— from the noise, and from its effect. “Should we keep going?” 

“Yeah,” said Ruby, stubborn.

“We must,” said Sapphire, certain.

xxxx

The next door, too, closed behind them the moment they stepped through. The noise didn’t become any quieter. It seemed to reverberate through the floor.

This chamber was just as plain as the last, but smaller, and not empty. There was an old rusty workbench in the centre, its surface covered with wires, tools, electronics. Steven, Sapphire and Ruby inspected it for the artefact they’d come to retrieve. They didn’t find it, but they found something familiar.

“A destabiliser,” Steven said, touching the item gingerly. It looked much like the device from the green hand ship— but bigger, clunkier. An older model. Much older. This thing was not the sleek little weapon Jasper had used to attack Garnet, but something which looked like it would be horribly awkward to drag into a flight. 

It also looked like something else. It took Steven a moment to place: a tuning fork.

Though it was inactive, Ruby and Sapphire remained a safe distance away.

xxxx

The next chamber was somewhat differently designed. It had six walls, not four, arranged in a perfect hexagon. They were all plain white, with two exceptions. One wall, directly opposite, was instead a dull, yet reflective grey: it reminded Steven of a one-way mirror, like in cop shows. The wall next to that was bright red, and in it was embedded something that seemed to be...

“A giant speaker?” said Steven.

“Looks like,” said Ruby. Two circles, arranged on top of each other, big, black and pillowy. It would have fit in perfectly at one of Sour Cream’s raves. Next to the speaker was a series of buttons and glowing lights. The control panel, presumably.

The three looked around. Speakers, controls, a one-way mirror. That was it.

“No door,” said Sapphire.

Ruby shrugged. She grinned at her reflection in the mirror, summoning her gauntlet. “I’ll make one.”

Ruby stepped forward, and crossed some invisible line. Lights flickered on the control panel: blue, yellow, white.

Steven’s shield grew. Without even thinking, he stepped in front of Ruby and Sapphire, just as the speaker roared into life.

The sound was a boom. A screech, a scratch, a hiss, low and high at the same time, sharp and piercing—

— or maybe. Steven couldn’t quite make it out. The sound seemed to bounce right off and away from his shield, never quite reaching the ears. But he could feel it, vibrating. The impact of each note seemed to strike Steven to his core.

Now Ruby was blazing hot, and Sapphire freezing cold, and fear was written plain on their faces. Steven had a certainty that whatever else, hearing that sound directly would be very, very bad.

“We gotta stop it!” shouted Ruby, over the din. “Walk us there, Steven—” she pointed to the controls— “We’ll shut it down!”

Steven nodded. Shield held up, the others huddled close, he took a step towards the speaker. Then another, and another. The sound got louder and louder, the closer he got. It shook at his bones. Soon he was trembling with the effort.

“Don’t— know— if I can—” Steven gasped. He could hear his heart pounding his ears. They weren’t even halfway there yet. He was straining, straining to keep his shield up, but…

“Don’t worry,” said Sapphire. She pushed away her bangs, and stared at the controls. She looked Steven directly in the eyes, then Ruby. She said, “I love you.”

And she took off.

“What—?” said Steven, too shocked to react.

Horror raced across Ruby’s face, pure fear. She reached out to grab her partner, but Sapphire was too fast— already she was out of range, out of the safety of the shield, running dead-tilt towards the speaker’s control panel.

Sapphire was fast, but sound was faster.

Her body was flickering, twisting, as she flew. Her dress was billowing out, out, like a sail, or wings— her hair thickened, like feathers— her back was hunching— her fingers curling—

Ruby tried to run after her, then, but Steven grabbed her, his grip horrible strong.

Sapphire reached the far wall. She was hunched over, her body flinching at each beat. She reached out a hand— talon, now— and pressed the buttons, all of them, with a single swipe.

The song stopped. Sapphire fell to the ground.

There was a moment of deafening silence.

Utter stillness.

Then Ruby rushed forward, eyes bright with tears. “Sapphire-!”

The creature which had been Sapphire raised its head, and screeched. 


	2. Lost

“No, no, no—” Ruby whispered. “Sapphy— Saphhy—”

Steven gulped, and licked the palm of his hand. 

“It’s okay,” he said, and he wasn’t sure who he was talking to. His shield was still out. He remembered what had happened last time he’d tried to heal a newly corrupted Gem. He tried to push that out of his mind. He took a few careful steps towards Sapphire, reaching his hand towards her.

Sapphire didn’t strike. She didn’t lash out. She just backed away, her feet scrambling against the hard stone floor. Her single eye was wide with terror and confusion. 

Her eye was now set in a face which was strange, yet still familiar. Still small and round, but the nose and mouth jutted out into a slender muzzle. Her hair had turned into long white feathers. Her mouth was a thin line, sharp white teeth visible. They were barred.

Steven took another step forward. Sapphire made a low keening sound at the back of her throat, holding up a talon as if telling him to stay back. When she caught sight of it— saw how wrong it was, how the fingers had fused into a single clawed digit—a shock ran through her. She screeched again, she shook, she shivered, her feathered plume puffing out huge. Her talons clawed at each other, as if he was trying to cut them away.

“Sapph— Sapphire,” Ruby managed. “Please, it’s okay to be okay.”

Sapphire didn’t— couldn’t— listen. The temperature was plummeting. Frost formed on the walls all around them, and the spit on Steven’s hand froze instantly.

Steven made a decision. He flushed his mouth full with saliva, screwed up his face, took aim, and _spat_ —

The sound of it startled Sapphire, who rose onto her hind legs and thrashed her tail. That just made her a bigger target, and the healing spit hit true.

But her fear had made the air even colder than before, and by the time the spit hit, it was frozen. The ice-glob hit against her scaly chest with a tiny _ping,_ and bounced off. 

Sapphire released a high trill of pain.

The sound was sharp and splitting. Steven’s hands flew to cover his ears, and even Ruby grunted from the pain. Cracks began forming in the frozen one-way mirror, growing larger and larger—

Sapphire went a note higher, and the mirror shattered.

The creature didn’t stop or hesitate. She saw her escape route. She jumped into the air and scampered off. 

xxxx

Lapis and Peridot were still in the instrument storeroom, having long since been distracted from the goal of the mission. Lapis was playing a wind instrument, a sweet tune filling the air. Peridot was attempting to company her with six metal drums which floated in the air around them like a very loud flock of birds.

There was a loud swoosh from the end of the hallway, as something small and blue hurtled right towards them.

They jumped back in surprise. Peridot recovered the quickest. “Monster!” she yelled.

She seized one of the metal drumsticks with her power, and flung it at the creature as it flew past. 

Her powers still being weak and untrained, the drumstick fell several inches short of hitting its target, and the creature flew on. 

xxxx

Amethyst and Pearl, meanwhile, had actually managed to stay on-mission.

They were currently clinging to a once-magnificent chandelier, now long dilapidated by age. They were balancing on two of the chandeliers’ branches, staring at the centre piece floating in the middle. It had resisted all attempts to be speared or pulled into their grasp. Finally Amethyst took a flying leap from her branch, grabbed the thing mid-air, and had it bubbled by the time she landed on the opposite rung. 

“Nice job, Amethyst!” Pearl called.

Amethyst grinned, then took a closer look at the artefact. She said, “It looks like a speaker phone.”

“It is, essentially,” said Pearl. “It was modified so that the sounds it produces will cause crippling hallucinations in everyone who hears—”

“Woah, woah,” Amethyst interrupted. “Monster at three o’clock!”

The two looked down into the auditorium below. A creature had just raced in, and was leaping over chairs and benches, scattering what instruments remained in its rush. Amethyst dispelled the bubble with a tap, then jumped down at the monster, Pearl following suit. 

As Amethyst fell, she summoned her whip and let out a battle cry. This turned out to have been a bad decision. The creature heard, noticed the Gems for the first time, and rushed off.

“Drat,” Amethyst muttered, as she landed right where the creature had been a moment ago. She transformed into a flaming ball and went accelerating after it. 

Pearl ran behind them. Her spear was in her hand, ready to throw— but for some reason, she held onto it. Something, some gut instinct, was staying her hand. 

She’d seen many corrupted monsters since the War had ended. Many kinds of them. Hundreds, perhaps. She’d seen ones like this— small, blue, feathered, flying— but only twice. They were rare. She was certain that she knew what kind of Gem this was (or had been), and it sent an icy chill to her core.

But Amethyst chased, and she did too. 

Amethyst sped up a ramp, went sailing into the air— at the top of her arc she transformed back to her normal shape, and went diving at the monster. Her aim was perfect, but it seemed to know she was coming, somehow, and nimbly sidestepped.Amethyst ended up crashing head first into the ground.

She growled and picked herself up. They were out of the auditorium, now, and back at the Citadel’s entrance hall. The exit was at the hall’s end, sunlight streaming through the huge doors. The monster was heading right towards them, and it was gonna get away—

Her whip shot out, and twisted around the monster’s long, billowy tail. The monster hissed and yanked back, sending Amethyst sprawling. The whip vanished. The monster stared back at her and Pearl for a moment, then raced out of the citadel.

Amethyst got up again, and watched as the thing sailed up into the sky. She muttered, “Thanks for the help, P.”

Pearl didn’t answer. There was a dreadful fear in the back of her mind.

xxxx

Pearl and Amethyst set off to tell the others about what had happened. They met with Lapis and Peridot first, who said they had no idea where the others were. They all set off searching together.

They found Ruby and Steven in the dungeons, not long after. Neither had moved. Ruby was on her knees, sobbing, surrounded by shattered glass. Steven’s face was buried into her shoulder.

xxxx

Ruby was inconsolable. When she wasn’t crying, she was yelling, or burning, too hot for anyone to get close. So as they made their way out of the Citadel, Steven explained instead.

He told them what had happened in a quiet, hollow voice that didn’t fit him.

Amethyst stared. Pearl sniffed. Lapis and Peridot fidgeted, left wordless. 

xxxx

Outside the Citadel of Sounds, they searched and searched, but Sapphire was long gone.


	3. Distraught

Ruby couldn’t be around the others. She just couldn’t bear it. 

When they first warped back, her first instinct was to head towards the Temple. But she stopped when she saw the door, five points of a star-- and the blue stone embedded right next to her red.

Garnet barely ever used her room. Rarely saw the need for it. But just then, Ruby _needed_ that space, needed it more than ever, but she couldn’t have it— because Garnet wasn’t— because Sapphire—

She couldn’t stay in the house, she might burn it down— and the others—

She ran for the beach.

She heard someone shouting her name, Steven maybe, or Amethyst, or both— and heard someone else holding them back— but she couldn’t care, she couldn’t.

xxxx

Ruby buried herself in the sand, and screamed.

xxxx

Lapis warped away to the barn.

She wasn’t good with other people. She never had been, and she certainly wasn’t now. Not about this. Not about things like grief, and fusion.

She left the others to their thoughts, and tried to ignore her own.

xxxx

Amethyst retreated into her own room, and began to smash her things. Fridges, bicycles, chairs, clocks, bagpipes, even vintage records she’d been meaning to give to Greg. She punched them, threw them, kicked them, tore them to pieces.

Finally she stopped and fell tot he ground, exhausted.

She was scared, and confused, and angry, and anxious and worried and and and—

— and Sapphire had flown by, and she’d _attacked_ her. 

Sapphire had flown by, and she’d let her _get away_. 

Amethyst sat up, and pulled her legs to her chest. She wrapped her arms around them, and stared off into the distance.

There had to be a way to fix this. There had to.

xxxx

Pearl paced.

She kept heading off somewhere— to the beach, to Steven’s room, to the Temple, to the barn— then stopping and changing directions. Words kept running through her mind, comforts and explanations, but none of them seemed right.

She hadn’t been there. Hadn’t seen Sapphire turn. But she could imagine it all too clearly.

She’d been there the first time. The sky had burned and the air had screamed, and she’d hidden behind Rose’s shield and watched, helpless, as everyone else had transformed.

Not everyone. Rose had been with her, and Garnet.

But now Rose was gone, and Garnet— Garnet—

Her eyes burned and her through caught. Pearl stopped herself before she started to cry.

She wasn’t alone. There was Steven to think about. And Amethyst. And Peridot, and even Lapis. And Ruby. Especially Ruby.

She couldn’t afford to break down. She had to stay strong.

She didn’t know if she could fix this, or even make it hurt less. But she couldn’t just stand there. She had to do _something_. She’d always thought better when she was working.

So Pearl went to the kitchen, and began making Steven supper.

xxxx

Steven hid under his duvet.

He wished he could do something to distract himself. Watch TV. Play video games. Sleep. But he couldn’t. The mission— Sapphire’s transformation— Ruby’s breakdown— he kept replaying it all in his head.

‘ _You must be honest with your thoughts, and see them clearly._ ’ Garnet had told him that. And since she wasn’t here now to give him advice, he had to follow what she’d given him before. 

Sapphire was corrupted.

She’d been safe behind his shield. But that song— whatever it was— had been so powerful. It had slammed into him like the oceans waves, again and again and again. Sapphire hadn’t thought he’d be able to hold it, not long enough for them to shut off the speaker. She had future vision. She must’ve been right.

So instead of letting him fail— of letting them all get corrupted, she’d gone out, and done it alone. She’d protected them.

But she shouldn’t have had to. Steven had Rose Quartz’s shield. His mother had been strong enough to save them from the corruption. 

But he hadn’t been.

And he hadn’t been able to heal her, either. She’d been right _there_ , the corruption still fresh… If only he’d been faster, or tried harder, or…

It was like Jasper, all over again. Like Jasper, only worse, because this time it was _Sapphire_ , and this time…

… because this time, it really _was_ his fault.

xxxx

Peridot was conflicted. 

Everyone else was distraught. This was only to be expected. Ruby especially. Rubies were emotionally, prone to fits— but this Ruby had been very close to Sapphire. Although Peridot couldn’t quite comprehend their relationship, she kept recalling the episode where Pierre nearly died in a rockslide. The desperation in all the campers, the way Percy had stayed in the infirmary, by Pierre’s side all night— the fear on his face— if that was even _close_ to what Ruby was feeling—

Then it had to be unbearable.

And everyone else was feeling some degree of it too. Even Peridot

Not as intensely, though. Was that wrong? After all, she’d never really gotten to known this Sapphire. She’d know Garnet though. Garnet, the baffling perma-fusion, unlike any other Gem Peridot had ever met— quiet and serious and powerful and protective and gentle.

Peridot missed her.

She twisted at her bowtie. Surely there had to be a solution to the predicament. It simply needed to be found. The others were too emotionally compromised to think logically, so the task fell to her her.

Steven. Steven could heal. He had told her how he’d partially-healed a corrupted Gem some time ago, and he had offered the same healing to Jasper. The process had not been perfect, but a partial success was better than none.

Problem: healing could not be applied if Sapphire was not present.

Goal: Find Sapphire.

But how? Even corrupted, she was fast. She had long since left the immediate vicinity of the Citadel of Sounds, and if she had flown at a consistent rate since, then the search area would only have grown. They would need to cover a massive range, which would be time-consuming and inefficient. They needed a way to narrow the area down, and pinpoint Sapphire’s location. 

Peridot thought and thought, and then sprung to her feet in triumph. Yes! _Yes_ , she had just the method!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writing angst is fun. or maybe the word's cathartic?


	4. Hope

Deep under the sand, it was dark and hot. Down there Ruby could almost allow herself to forget anything else existed. Like she’d never even emerged in the first place. 

Then there came a heavy thudding from above.

Ruby tried to block the sound out, but the banging continued. And continued. 

“Go away!” she shouted. Or she tried to. Her mouth was filled with sand.

No, not sand. Glass. She’d turned all the sand into glass.

Just perfect.

Grumbling, and secretly glad to have something else to complain about, Ruby balled her fists and pounded on the glass cocoon that surrounded her. Once, twice, then it splintered and cracked. There was a muffled yelling from above. Ruby climbed towards it.

Her heard burst into the cool evening air. Ruby spat out a mouthful of glass. “ _What_?”

Amethyst stopped mid-jump. She was the one who’d been making the thudding.The others were hanging a few feet back, huddled together. The expressions on Pearl and Steven’s faces were almost too much to bear. 

But there was something else in those expressions, something besides the expected grief and pain, something that pulled Ruby back. Something small but hopeful. Something that was just enough to keep Ruby from immediately burying herself again. 

Amethyst held out a hand. “Come on,” she said. “We’re going to go find Sapphire.”

Ruby stared. Then she grabbed Amethyst’s hand, and allowed herself to be pulled up.

xxxx

They all ended up on the lawn outside the barn— even Lapis had flown down from her rooftop perch to join them. They were gathered around the drill, which had been dragged out of storage. Peridot had vanished into its cockpit, busily doing something which was creating a great deal of scrapping and banging. Finally she emerged with something clearly pulled straight from the control panel, loose circuitry and wires still hanging from it. 

“A Gem Tracker!” Peridot declared. 

“We salvaged it from the escape pod,” said Pearl. “Its original purpose was to locate and communicate with Gem-powered structures.”

“We modified it to locate the Cluster specifically. We had the coordinates from the Moon Base, but the tracking system helped direct the drill’s navigation,” Peridot said.“Theoretically we should be able to modify it to track Sapphire instead. All we require is her Gem signature.”

“Which we have stored at the Temple,” finished Pearl.

Hope flared, hot and fierce in Ruby’s gem. She clamped down on the feeling before it could blaze out of control.

“Are you sure?” Ruby asked. “Can you really do it?”

“It should be quite simple,” said Peridot.

Steven’s usual excitement was returning. “So this can lead us right to her?”

“… no,” admitted Peridot.

“Its accuracy is limited,” said Pearl quickly. “But it’ll narrow her location down to a three-mile radius.”

“Which is better than nothing,” said Amethyst.

“Could you make it better?” Ruby demanded.

Peridot scratched her chin. “Theoretically. We could integrate systems from the Roaming Eye. But it would take some time.”

“How long?”

“A week, perhaps.” Despite everything, Peridot shot a quick glance at Lapis, who gave her friend a smile for the successful usage of human time-scales.

Ruby let out a long, hard breath.

Three miles. Amethyst was right. Better than nothing. They could work with three miles.

She balled her left hand into a fist and punched her palm. “Okay!” she said, mustering some confidence. “Let’s head out!”

Smiles bloomed all around.

Lapis, standing a little ways from the others, frowned. “Uh, isn’t it kind of dark?”

“She’s right,” said Steven. “It _is_ pretty late.”

And indeed, the sun was just vanishing behind the horizon, casting the world in long red shadows. Soon night would have fallen completely, and away from the lights of civilisation, it would be nearly impossible to see anything. 

Ruby glowered. Not at Steven or Lapis, but at the situation. At herself. If she hadn’t let Sapphire go— if she had just ran after her— if she hadn’t spent so long hiding in the sand—

… Okay. Okay. Eight hours. Eight hours until morning. That wouldn’t make that much of a difference. Sapphire would be okay for that long.

“We go first thing tomorrow,” Ruby vowed.

xxxx

Even though it was a Friday night, Connie was not in a good mood.

Classes that day had been long and boring. She’d snapped one of her strings during violin practice. Dinner been one of her least favourite meals, pesto pasta. She’d spent the last two hours battling her way through trigonometry homework, without much success. Now she was turning in for the night, but it looked as though she’d have to spend a good portion of the weekend finishing it off. 

Her phone rang just as she slipped under the covers. Connie glowered at it; the ringing continued. Finally she got out of bed to answer it. Even seeing Steven’s name on the screen did little to soften her mood.

“Yes?” she snapped, more sharply than she meant to.

“Connie? Can you come on a mission tomorrow?” Steven’s voice broke. “Please. It’s important. I need you.”

xxxx

The search party set out at eight AM sharp Saturday morning. That was the time in Beach City, at least. The Citadel was farther west, and there, it was not even dawn yet. Sunlight was just a thin and watery line creeping over the horizon, very faint through the morning mist.

Ruby surveyed the landscape. It wasn’t the Himalayas, but it wasn’t exactly flat, either. This place was craggy, covered in tress and low bushes. Lots of spots for a corrupted Gem to hide. They might never find her.

_Don’t think that_ , Ruby told herself.

Peridot held up the tracker, and everyone crowded to get a look at the monitor. Circles were radiating out from the centre; after a few moments a blip appeared at the very edge.

Peridot pointed at it and cried, “There! That’s her!”

Sapphire was somewhere North of their location, and if she was moving, it wasn’t fast. The group set off.

Nobody spoke. Not even Steven. Everyone was too preoccupied, too busy watching the world around them for signs of Sapphire.

And watching Ruby.

Ruby knew she wasn’t the most perceptive Gem in the galaxy, but even she couldn’t fail to notice the way everyone orbited nervously around her. How Peridot kept sneaking quick glances, how Connie couldn’t quite meet her eyes. Amethyst kept shooting her encouraging thumbs-up, while Pearl flittered behind her like a hummingbird. Lapis was the only one acting halfway normal.

The same could not be said for Steven. The boy was hunched over, his eyes set on some determined point in the distance.

_He blames himself_ , Ruby thought. She knew she should go to him, try to console him, comfort him. Tell him that if anyone was to blame, it was her. She should have realised the danger, should have known Sapphire’s plan, should have been faster, should have stopped her, should have—

“She’s close,” announced Peridot. They were right on top of the blip now. Somewhere in the surrounding three-mile circle was Sapphire.

Ruby shook herself mentally. Not now. No time. Sapphire— her beautiful, bold Sapphire— had sacrificed herself for their sakes, and now Ruby had to focus if she wanted to get her back.

The place they’d stopped was much like the landscape they’d been transversing all morning. Hilly and wild, heavily forested.

Ruby knew Sapphire better than anyone. She’d shared her mind for literally thousands of years. Even with Sapphire’s body reshaped and her thoughts clouded, Ruby still had to know her. Sapphire was scared, and confused— where would she go?

“Okay,” Ruby said, and everyone looked at her. “Sapphire’s always liked small, quiet places. That’s probably where she’s gone. Look in every nook and cranny. If she’s found somewhere she feels safe, she won’t be moving much. If you don’t scare her, she probably won’t run off.”

Everyone nodded.

“We have three walkie talkies.” Ruby looked at Connie, who pulled off her backpack and pulled the devices out. “So we’ll go in three groups.”

Amethyst raised her hand. “I’ll go by myself. I’m faster than everybody else.”

Ruby wasn’t sure that was a good idea, but then, she wasn’t sure about anything anymore. But with her rolling, Amethyst _was_ fast, so she nodded.

“I can fly,” said Lapis. It was maybe the first thing she’d said all morning. “I’ll have a good overhead view.”

“Could you carry us?” Steven asked, motioning to him and Connie.

“I could. But it’ll be awkward carrying two people for too long. I don’t want to drop you.”

The kids looked at each other, and something passed between them. They didn’t dance. They just clasped their hands, and then Stevonnie was there.

At the sight, Ruby felt a sharp pang of joy. Joy, and envy.

No. _No_. She was not going to take this out on Stevonnie. She was not. 

Amethyst and Pearl were unfazed by the fusion, but Lapis and Peridot were taken aback. Peridot shrieked a loud, “You can _fuse_?” and raced forward to start prodding Stevonnie.

It startled a laugh out of them. “That tickles!”

Lapis, who’d taken a step back when they’d fused, seemed to relax a little. She came closer again. “Alright. That’ll work.”

That left Ruby in a group with Pearl and Peridot. Fine. Good.

She had one last thing to say before everyone split up. “If you find any sign of Sapphire, say so.Right away. Don’t go after her alone. We can’t let her run off again.” Ruby scrunched her eyes shut against the threat of tears. “Let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aiming for two chapters this week, we'll see how that works out.


	5. Tracking

From the moment they formed, Stevonnie felt as though they might be falling apart.

But they knew what to do. They let their memories, their pain, their uncertainties wash over them. Half of them relieved it all, while the other half lived it anew.

_You did your best_ , Connie said.

_My best should have been better_ , Steven retorted.

The image of Rose Quartz loomed over them.

Stevonnie waved their hand, and the vision dissolved into a hundred butterflies. _You can do something your mom never could. You can heal corruption._

_Yeah. Yeah, I can._

_Then let’s go do it._

xxxx

Amethyst slid down mountainsides, rolled up slopes, jumped over ledges. She searched beneath logs and dove into ponds. Even when she slowed down, she never let herself stop completely. 

As long as she kept moving, it would be okay.

xxxx

Their job was to keep a look out for Sapphire, but more often than not Pearl found her eyes drawn to Ruby instead.

Pearl was worried about her. Of course she was. Losing Sapphire… it was unthinkable. 

Ruby was a volatile Gem at the best of times, and in the face of such grief, Pearl was afraid of what she might do.

At least Ruby wasn’t crying anymore. At least she wasn’t hiding beneath the stand, or burning the ground wherever she walked. No, she was on the move now, trampling through the underbrush, a determined set in her step. When Ruby put her mind to something, there was no stopping her.

Still.

Peridot scampered ahead on all fours, then came to a sudden stop to check the tracking device. Something on the monitor prompted her to bring up her tablet and make a note. Ruby didn’t complain about the pause, but instead went to investigate some nearby bushes.

Pearl took the opportunity. She approached her friend and said quietly, “Ruby?”

Ruby jumped, twisting to face her. She sagged when she noticed who it was. “Oh. Pearl.”

Pearl didn’t ask ‘how are you feeling?’ She already knew the answer. She didn’t make any meaningless reassurances, didn’t make any promises she couldn’t keep. She just said, “I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault.”

Ruby bent down and went back to searching the bushes.

“I know,” Pearl said, even though she wasn’t certain about that. She had spent the night wondering what could have been done differently— if she’d been the one in that chamber, or Amethyst— or Peridot or Lapis— or anyone with a longer range. Anyone who could have reached the control panel without being exposed, anyone who could have avoided this mess. Not that those thoughts were much help. “I’m still sorry, though. I know how much…”

Ruby nodded. They were both veterans of the war. They had both lost people, people they loved.

Peridot finished whatever she was doing and started off again, so Pearl and Ruby followed. They fell into step together, Ruby’s quick march matching Pearl’s longer strides.

“I keep forgetting,” Ruby admitted. “I sometimes… sometimes I think I’m Garnet. I think I’m taller, or I go to adjust my glasses, or…”

Pearl made a small sound of understanding. She knew the feeling. How many times in the past fourteen years she’d thought of something she wanted to tell Rose, or picked up some little trinket she was sure Rose would love. And then she’d turn to share it, only to suddenly _remember_ , reality hitting like a meteor. 

“Future vision is the worst,” Ruby continued. “I keep trying to **See**. But then there’s nothing, nothing at all… and…”

A fierce heat billowed off her, scolding even to Pearl. Pearl didn’t move away. Just let it pass.

It simmered down. Ruby’s voice was a whisper. “I just want her safe. Right now she’s alone, and she’s scared… I just want to be _there_ for her.”

xxxx

Lapis had never been to this particular part of Earth, but it still felt very familiar.

It had a lot of the same elements as by the barn. Leafy trees, grass, mist, bugs. Other things seemed to have come straight out of Camp Pining Hearts— rolling mountains, bright blue birds, pine cones lying on the ground, tress covered in tiny spikes. When she breathed in the air had a cool, sharp smell to it, and Lapis wondered if that was the pine-scent that Counsellor Trevor loved so much. She’d have to bring it up with Peridot, later.

One of those blue birds flew past. The first time Lapis had seen one from a distance, she’d thought it might be Sapphire. Stevonnie had gotten excited, until they’d recognised it and sighed. “Just a bluejay.” 

Lapis knew better now, but every time she caught sight of a bluejay out of the corner of her eye she still tensed up. 

Aside from the blue-jay incident, they flew in silence. Lapis didn’t mind. She enjoyed silence. But it did surprise her. Usually Steven couldn't keep quiet for two minutes.

But this wasn’t ‘usually’. And this wasn’t Steven.

Stevonnie’s grip was strong on Lapis’s shoulders, and their legs were wrapped securely around her waist. They didn’t speak, just scanned with the landscape below with a steady patience.

Lapis hadn’t been sure how to react to them. She hadn’t know Steven could fuse with humans; hadn’t know there were any he’d **want** to fuse with. But she supposed she shouldn’t have been surprised. From the moment Steven had first spoken to her, Lapis had known he wasn’t like any other Gem. Of course he'd be unconventional in this way.

So Steven could fuse with humans. She trusted Steven. And the human Connie seemed nice enough. And Stevonnie just wanted to find their friend, so Lapis was _fine_. 

But not fine enough, apparently, to stop Stevonnie from asking in her ear, “Is something wrong?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, well… yeah, obviously.” Stevonnie shifted a little, adjusting their grip. “But I meant— with you. You seem really tense.”

Lapis didn’t deny it. 

Everyone else was broken up about Sapphire. But Lapis?

Lapis didn’t really know Sapphire. Or Ruby. Or even Garnet. 

Garnet had been one of the Gems who’d kept her prisoner for thousands of years. Garnet may not have realised it, but she had. And when she’d discovered the truth, Garnet had still been set about keeping Lapis trapped. If she’d had her way, Lapis never would have escaped that horrible mirror. Lapis acknowledged that Garnet had only acted out of fear, worry, and desire to keep Steven and the Earth safe. Lapis felt she could understand that, and even respect it. 

So Garnet had seemed well enough. Quiet. Protective. Thoughtful. And at the baseball game, Ruby and Sapphire’s antics had been admittedly amusing. The pair had been quite friendly to her.

So Lapis didn’t really have anything against Garnet. But they weren’t friends.

Now Sapphire was corrupted, and Ruby had been left broken, and Lapis was mostly helping out of a sense of obligation. Even though…

“Ruby really misses Sapphire,” Lapis said.

“She does,” agreed Stevonnie. “They care about each other more than anything. They’re pretty much always fused, I can’t even imagine how strange it must be for them to be apart…. Oh…”

Lapis pulled her arms up around her chest, and stared down at the trees.

Sometimes the memories resurfaced. Of Jasper, of Malachite. Of that pain, that power. And Lapis would want nothing, nothing more, than to feel that power again.

And then she’d remember that Jasper was gone, that Jasper was corrupted, that Jasper was bubbled… and Lapis would wonder, what if she could fix it? Heal Jasper, bring her back. Maybe things would be better. Maybe _Jasper_ would be better. Maybe Jasper _had_ changed, and maybe they could…

It was stupid, stupid, stupid, a terrible idea— and Lapis always came back to herself, sooner or later. Never acted on her desires. Saw sense.

But here was Ruby, chasing after her corrupted partner, all just to fuse again, and—

“It’s different,” said Stevonnie, cutting through her thoughts. “Fusion. For Garnet. For me.”

“How?” Lapis said, because she was really, really struggling to see how that could be.

“It’s a partnership. Sapphire and Ruby, Connie and Steven… they _like_ being together. Spending time together. And fusion is just another way of doing that. 

“And when I’m me… it’s like nothing else. Even when I’m scared, or hurting… it’s like a hug, in my mind.”

Malachite hadn’t been like a hug. Malachite had _hurt_.

Lapis was searching for something to say when Stevonnie leaned forward.

“What’s that?” they said, pointing a finger.

Lapis followed it. “A river?”

“Yeah, but right there, see?”

Lapis looked closer. The river snaked, long and meandering, down the mountain. It glittered blue and shiny in the morning sun. But there, at one of the bends— there was something shinier, something almost white. Lapis flapped her wings and dove towards it.

Here the water ran along besides a rocky cliff, whittled down over millennia of erosion. It was stone all the way, except at one spot, where the rock was instead covered in a thick coating of...

“Ice,” said Lapis. That was unusual, wasn’t it? It was cooler here than at the barn, but not cold enough to freeze water. At least, not without magic.

“It’s Sapphire, it has to be!” said Stevonnie. They reached out a hand and pressed it against the ice. “It’s really cold. Fresh. She _has_ to be nearby.”

Lapis flew back a little to get a better view. The ice didn’t reach far; it was concentrated almost entirely in this one spot. The river wasn’t very fast here, and if she looked closely, she could just see under the surface, and how the ice continued deep below the waterline. “I think she’s down there somewhere.”

“But why? Lapis, could you check it out?”

Lapis agreed. She left them on the river bank, since the walkie talkie they carried would break if it got wet. Anyway, they needed to breath. So Lapis went into the river herself.

It was the first time she’d been fully submerged since Malachite, but she tried not to think about that. Instead, she swam to the cliff side, using her powers to fight against the flow. The icy coating extended right down to the bottom. It was thin enough that she could see the rock through it, except in one place, where it seemed thicker, and white all the way through. It seemed to extend quite a ways in.

Lapis emerged and returned to Stevonnie’s side. “I think there’s some sort of underwater cave down there. She’s blocked the entrance off with ice, but I could melt it.”

“No! No, not yet,” Stevonnie said. “The others are coming. We need to wait for Ruby.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sometimes i get a lot of feelings about how long Pearl and Garnet(and Sapphire and Ruby) have known each other, and I just... love them... so much...
> 
> I also love love love Stevonnie, they're so great, ahhhh.


	6. Found

There were no words left in the creature’s mind, but if there had, they would have been, _Get away get away get away_ ** _get away_**.

Get away from what? The creature wasn’t sure. Something was wrong, something was _wrong_ — but what, but what, it couldn’t remember.

There had been— there had been others. The creature had been hurting, it had been scared, it had just wanted to be alone, but there had been others. They had been loud, and hot, and they wouldn’t stay away. They had just kept coming closer. And sometimes it had Seen them move, and it was like they were places they weren’t, too hard to keep track, it had been _confusing_ , and it had hurt hurt _hurt_ —

Then something had it it, and there had been pain, right in its chest, ow ow ow, and the creature had just wanted to _get away_.

Then the wall had disappeared, which was loud and scary, but not as loud and scary as the others. So it had jumped and flew and ran. It hadn’t known where it was going, except somehow it had, it could See things, so it hadn’t gotten lost. More others had found it and attacked, but it had Seen them coming too, so it had been able to escape. But still the others had hurt it, like the purple one. The purple one had had a long spiky thing, and pulled its tail. So the creature had hurt the purple one back. 

And then there had been sunlight and sky, and it had flown towards them, finally free.

xxxx

At first the creature felt relief. It was out of the cramped, scary placed, away from the ones who had yelled and hurt, out into the open air. That relief buoyed it up, up, and it soared over the greens and blues and browns of the landscape below.

But then the sunlight began to fade, and the relief faded with it.

The shadows were growing long, and in them the creature realised it recognised nothing. Everything seemed unfamiliar, everything strange. Everything big and empty, stretching on and on, and it didn’t know where to go.

There was somewhere that wasn’t like this. Somewhere safe. Somewhere secure, somewhere familiar. 

But it couldn’t remember where that somewhere was.

The sun was gone now, its warmth gone too. The creature remembered a warmth, all around. It missed it missed it missed it.

The sun was gone, and now the only lights were the little white ones high above. _Stars_ , some distant part of the creature remembered. They should have been beautiful, but they weren’t. They were… they were…

_… cold, and lonely and… far away…_

The snatch of thought vanished, and the creature thrashed its tail in frustration.

It was getting tired. It wanted to land. It stared down at the now dark landscape, wondering where it could go. To be away from the stars, to rest, to be safe.

It Saw somewhere. Somewhere calm and quiet and cold. It Saw itself curled up there.

It knew where to find that place.

The creature flared its tail and angled its head downward. It fell into a dive, ears pricked. It followed the sound of rushing water, until it could see the dark waves directly below, feel the wet spray on itsscales. It followed the river until it Saw the place it must go, and dove into the water.

The river was dark and fast and roiling, and it threatened to pull the creature down. But the creature was strong and certain. All along the river’s side was a rocky cliff— but there was a gap in the stone. The creature aimed itself at that gap, propelling itself with its strong limbs and long tail. It was out of the current, swimming up a tunnel. Soon there was rock under its claws. The creature stopped swimming and started climbing, until its head burst through to the surface. 

It was dark here, darker even than the night outside. But it was a _smaller_ dark, a _safer_ dark. The creature pulled itself out of the water and onto a rocky ledge. Each step sent echoes through the cave.

The creature laid down, exhausted. It shifted its head so that its plume fell down in front. The creature began to preen at its feathers with its long claws.

That… wasn’t right, was it? It wasn’t supposed to have claws— it was supposed to have—

Have what? It couldn’t think. And besides, some part of the creature found that this _did_ feel right, so surely it had to be.

Finally finished with the preening, the creature rested its head on its plume and curled its tail tight around its body. It stared forward. In the darkness, it couldn’t see. It couldn’t See anything.

It had no idea what to do next.

Ice formed, all around. The creature closed its eye and did not sleep. 

xxxx

Suddenly, it Saw something.   
  
It Saw the temperature rising. It Saw the ice melting. It Saw the water rippling. It Saw two others coming out of it.

There was no way to escape it, no way to avoid it. So it opened its eyes and waited.

The temperature rose.

The ice melted.

The water rippled.

Two others came out of it. 

The others filled the cave with light, pink and red. The creature recognised the red one from before. It had radiated heat, and had yelled and yelled and hadn’t stayed back. It didn’t know this other one— but it was big, and it was with the red one, so the creature pressed itself away from them. 

The others were watching it. They were making noises, too, just like last time— but the noises were softer. Gentler. And they were staying back.

Were they going to hurt it? They weren’t attacking. They just floated in the water, not coming any closer. But they were still strange, and scary, and it wished they would go away. 

But they didn’t. They stayed in the water, making sounds. Or the same sound, again and again, and the creature felt it should recognise that sound, but it didn’t, it didn’t, and it wished they’d go away.

Finally the others grew quiet. The creature watched them, and they watched it back.

They weren’t going to hurt it. The creature Saw that, now.

Instead, the red one started making a sound again. It wasn’t like the last one, the same noise repeated over and over. This was low and sweet and achingly familiar.It echoed around the cave, echoed around the creature’s mind. It creature could remember it from somewhere… It cocked its head, straining to listen, straining to remember…

The red one sang, and then, the creature opened its mouth, and began to sing with it. Simple notes, strung together, one after the other. They came together to form a harmony. To form music.

Still singing, the red one swam closer. Slowly, slowly, not even splashing at all. And the creature didn’t flinch away. Soon the red one had reached the water’s edge, and it was so close that the creature could feel the heat radiating off of it. That heat— that warmth— felt familiar. Like sunlight. Safe, secure.

It wanted that warmth.

Slowly, the creature crawled to the end of the ledge. It hesitated for a long moment- then it extended its neck, and pressed its snout against the red one’s face. 

The red one was so _warm_. 

At the touch the red one stopped its song and started making that noise again, but even softer. It didn’t sound scary at all any more. 

The big one swam over. This made the creature a little nervous, but it could See that the big one didn’t want to hurt it anymore than the red one did. Instead, the big one just climbed up onto the rocky ledge and sat next to it. The red one even backed away to let it.

The big one held out a hand, palm up. It wanted something. What did it want?

The creature Saw itself putting one of its forefeet in the big one’s hand. It Saw the big one smiling.

So the creature placed its forefoot in the big one's hand.

The big one smiled, then turned the creature’s foot over. There, among its white scales was a single blue one, larger and harder than all the others. The big one did something very odd then. It leaned forward, and pressed its mouth against the blue scale and —

_Light_.

It overwhelmed her. The light was everywhere, everywhere— it was in her mind, in her body. It _was_ her body. She fell to the ground, gasping, blinking. 

She was shaking. She pushed herself up, bracing her hands against the cool, hard rock.

Hands. Hands, she had _hands_. Long and sharp, but they were hands, with five fingers— she had hands.

The red one was making that noise again, and loudly, but it wasn’t just a noise. She recognised it. “Sapphire, Sapphire— Sapphy, are you okay?”

Sapphire. That was _her_. That was her name. 

Sapphire turned to look at the red one— no, not the red one. “ _Ruby_!”

She tried to say it, but it didn’t come out right. It was half-screech, half-yell, but that was alright, that was okay, Ruby was here, it had been Ruby the whole time. Sapphire threw herself at her, burying her head in Ruby’s shoulder. Ruby hugged her back. She was shaking, sobbing, shivering.

There was another flash of light, this one pink. Sapphire looked up to see what it was. The big one was gone, two smaller people in their place— 

— and again recognition slammed into her. Connie. _Steven_.

They’d healed her. Stevonnie had healed her.

Of course. That felt right, somehow. Of course they had.

Steven was scrambling to his feet. “Sapphire! Are you— uh—”

“Can you understand us?” asked Connie.

Again Sapphire tried to speak, but all that came out was squawks. Sapphire nodded instead.

Connie and Steven smiled. Sapphire did too, but it didn’t seem to work very well. Her face wasn’t the right shape.

Ruby reached out, and traced a warm hand down her snout. “Sapphire,” she said, and it was like a prayer. “Oh, Sapphire, I thought I’d lost you.”

_Never_ , Sapphire wanted to say, but instead she just pulled Ruby close.

A moment later, Steven came too, wrapping his arms around them. Connie hesitated, and then joined as well, tentatively stroking at Sapphire’s plume. hey sat like that for a long while, just holding each other.

Finally, reluctantly, Ruby pulled away— though she didn’t let go of Sapphire’s hand. “Come on,” she said. “We need to get you home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was, quite possibly, one of the trickiest bits of writing I've ever done. Writing from the perspective of a corrupted Gem is tricky. Writing from the perspective of someone with future vision is hard. Put them together? Oh man.
> 
> Anyway, Sapphire's had an initial healing kiss, but she's still far from recovered. At least she has her family with her now.


	7. Friends

Four Gems waited anxiously by the riverbank, watching the river for any sign of movement below.

They couldn’t all go after Sapphire, they’d realised very early. By Lapis’s estimation, the cave she was hiding in was very small— and besides, they didn’t want to risk scaring her away. Ruby had gone, of course, because of all of them, she certainly had the best chance of reaching out to her partner. Stevonnie had accompanied her, to provide the actual healing.

But there was a chance that things wouldn’t go as plan. That Sapphire would try to escape again, or…

Well, if she tried to run off, the others would be there to catch her. Lapis was hovering above the river, ready to scoop Sapphire up in a watery grip. If somehow that failed, Amethyst had her whip out, and Peridot and Pearl were standing ready with a fishing net.

They began their vigil fully alert, but as time dragged on and there was no sign of them, their attention waned. Lapis began to droop. Peridot scowled and gripped the net more tightly, determined not to fail. Amethyst found herself beginning to fidget, and then remembering what was at stake, refocused herself. Only Pearl seemed unmoved, well accustomed with stakeouts from the war.  


“Has something gone wrong?” Amethyst whispered.

“Quiet,” Pearl commanded.

Amethyst went quiet.

The only sounds were rushing water and bird song when finally, two heads burst out of the water. Steven and Connie, gasping for breath. Everyone jumped, instantly alert. Stevonnie had seemed in no rush to defuse before— had something happened to make them split?

But Steven was grinning, and Connie shouted, “They’re coming!”

Lapis levitated the pair to the shore in a bubble of water. She had just dropped them there when Ruby and Sapphire surfaced. Lapis didn’t use her water abilities to grab them. Partly, this was because she didn’t need to— Sapphire floated out of the water herself, pulling Ruby along with her. But partly, she was distracted by Sapphire’s appearance. 

Sapphire didn’t look as monstrous as before, but she didn’t look like a normal Sapphire either. Her face was still slanted, her proportions still slightly off-kilter, her body hunched forward. Her ‘hair’ still wasn’t hair at all, but a plume of water-logged feathers, stretching from her head all the way down her back, where it blended in with the ruffles of her dress. Her hands were hands again, with five fingers, though still clawed at the end, and covered in fine white scales instead of gloves. Her legs could only just be made out beneath the folds of her dress, and even then, they didn’t quite seem to be bending the right way. 

Lapis gave herself a mental shake and refocused. She needed to be ready if Sapphire tried to fly off. The other Gems had come to the same conclusion. Pearl and Peridot adjusted their grip on the net, while Amethyst drew back a little on her whip…

… which was a mistake.

Sapphire hadn’t seemed at all nervous, until she looked down, saw Amethyst, saw the whip, and _screeched_. She jerked up and back, startling a yelp out of Ruby.

“It’s okay!” Ruby yelled, as calmly as she could, considering she was dangling in mid-air. “Sapphire, it’s okay, they’re our _friends_ —”

But Sapphire was rising farther and farther, her gown beating desperately like a giant tail. Amethyst pulled back on her whip, ready to lasso Sapphire and reign her in. 

But Steven yelled, “Stop, she’s just scared! She’s scared! Amethyst—”

Amethyst flinched, but she saw he was right. Sapphire’s single eye was fixed right on her, and her alone. Amethyst's whip vanished. She threw up her hands in a sign of peace. “See?” she said. “All gone! Gone!”

And Sapphire did seem to calm a little at that. 

“She’s not going to hurt you,” Ruby said. Voice soft, soothing. “That’s Amethyst. You remember Amethyst, right? She’s our friend. _Friend_.”

And slowly, surely, with more coaxing and calmly, Sapphire started to drift downwards. Pearl and Peridot put down the net. Lapis stayed in her position above the river, just in case. Finally, Sapphire’s claws touched down on the ground.

Steven immediately came forward to embrace her, though the others kept their distance. “You did it Sapphire! Good job!”

Sapphire snuffled him in a friendly way. Lapis floated down, and exchanged a look with Peridot. Pearl took a few careful steps closer. (Amethyst did not.)

“Hello, Sapphire,” Pearl said. “I… uh. How are you doing?”

Sapphire’s lips curled up in what was probably a smile. Pearl answered it with an uncertain smile of her own, and hesitantly, the others joined in.

xxxx

It took nearly three hours of hiking to reach the nearest warp pad. Perhaps they could have gotten there sooner, but Sapphire kept getting distracted. She’d wander off, snuffling into a bush or snapping at a passing squirrel. Sometimes she’d just freeze— not with fear, but a thoughtfulness, as if she was hearing (or Seeing) something no one else could.

Eventually they got there, though. It took a fair bit of shuffling to fit every one onto the warp pad at once— although it helped that Sapphire floated above their heads. She didn’t actually walk very much, since her legs didn’t quite seem quite the right right shape, so flying was simply easier. There was a flash of bright light, and the group reappeared in the Temple. 

“Here we are Sapphy!” Ruby said. “Home!”

Sapphire cocked her head, then rushed forward in a sudden leap. First she rushed up to the Temple door, where she pressed her snout agains the blue stone, then the red one. Then she leapt away again, investigating the kitchen, the living area, Steven’s bedroom.

“Oh— should we stop her— ?” Pearl began, because Sapphire was going very fast, and more than once her tail-like gown came dangerously close to knocking something over. 

The others didn’t seem to even notice. Ruby was right at Sapphire’s side, while Steven and Connie were close behind. Pearl looked at Amethyst, who shrugged and went after them, though without much enthusiasm. Twining her fingers nervously, Pearl followed. Peridot and Lapis watched from the warp pad, curious, but somehow feeling that this wasn’t quite their place.

Sapphire prodded at pillows, tapped counters, leafed through books. Was she refamiliarising herself with them, or did she not remember what they were for at all? No one was entirely sure.

She was making her way through Steven’s room when she finally came to a stop in front of a framed family picture sitting next to Steven’s bed. Her single eye stared at it, unblinking.

“That’s us, Sapphire,” said Steven. “See?”

Sapphire picked up the frame, then settled down on the floor. Ruby crouched besides her, and pointed. She said, “There’s Steven, and Pearl. And that’s Amethyst.” Sapphire blinked then, thrashing her tail; Ruby stroked her gently. “Here’s Greg. And that’s— that’s Garnet…” Ruby’s voice warbled, uncertainty in it for the first time since she’d found Sapphire. “That’s us, Sapphire. Together. Fused.”

Sapphire blinked at Ruby, expression unreadable.

“Does she remember…?” Pearl wondered, while Amethyst shifted uneasily.

“She saw Stevonnie,” said Connie. “So she should have some idea, right? Maybe we could fuse again?”

“Yeah, but we won’t be able to _tell_ if she understands,” grumbled Amethyst. 

Steven perked up. “Idea!” he shouted. He dashed off, rummaged through some drawers, then returned with a thick pile of paper and a set of crayons. “This is how I talked to Centi. Maybe the same thing will work with Sapphire.”

Less than a minute later, all of them— even Peridot and Lapis— were gathered on the couches around the coffee table. Sapphire sat— or rather, crouched— on the floor, the papers scattered in front of her. She surveyed the crayons, then picked up the red one. Maybe that meant something; maybe it had just been random choice. She held it for a long time in her claw-like fingers, staring at it, as if it was some machine of unfathomable complexity. Peridot resisted the urge to roll her eyes, while Lapis did her best not to flop backwards from boredom. Everyone else just tried not to fidget. Ruby just kept steadily stroking Sapphire’s feathers. 

“Just say whatever you want, okay. Take all the time you need,” Ruby said.

And once that time was taken, Sapphire carefully lowered her crayon to the paper, and began to write.

It took a while. Sapphire was slow— perhaps because she was still trying to remember how hands worked, or what language was, or perhaps it was just because she wanted to be as clear as possible. Perhaps it was all three. But the lines came together in relatively clear, cursive modern English. _You helped me?_

There came a chorus of nods and ‘ _yes_ ’es.

Sapphire considered this. She gripped the crayon more tightly, wrote something, then added one final word:

_Thank you all._

“You’re welcome,” Peridot said, sticking her chest out. “I was the one who created the device that allowed us to track you! If it wasn’t for me, you’d probably still be out there, wandering aimlessly as a wild beast.”

Sapphire blinked. The others stared. Lapis said, “Hey, Peridot, didn’t you want to show me that new meep-morp you were working on?”

“Huh? Oh, yes, but that can wait—”

“I want to see it now,” said Lapis.

“What’s gotten into you?” Peridot protested as Lapis took her by the hand and pulled her along. Peridot glared, but didn’t make any real attempt to escape as she was dragged to the warp pad. 

Pearl shot Lapis a quick, thankful look, and Lapis gave a small nod of acknowledgement. The pair called their good byes as they warped off, those remaining waving them off— except for Ruby, who was too focused on her partner, and Sapphire, who’s fingers were still firmly clenched around the crayon.

A strained silence descended. Nobody seemed quite sure what say. Amethyst was staring down at her lap, Connie was chewing her lip, while Steven fiddled nervously with a spare crayon. Pearl let out a little cough. “Sapphire— Can you— that is to say— do you remember us?”

Sapphire looked at her appraisingly, then slowly gazed around the room. Again, she wrote her response slowly and deliberately. _A little. Confused. I know you are friends._

Then she pressed her head against Ruby’s side and made a low clicking noise that resembled a purr. Ruby leaned into the touch, but her expression was just as uneasy as the others.

“So…” Amethyst said slowly, “how _much_ do you remember?”

_Don’t know._

Everyone stared at the answer she’d written. Steven was the first to brighten up. “Well that’s okay!” he said, with a grin that barely seemed forced. “We’ll just help you remember!”

“Y-yeah!” Ruby said, a little shaky. “We can tell you everything you know! I mean, we were fused basically all the time, so I can just tell you everything!”

And so the storytelling began.

It started up slowly. It was a daunting prospect, having to relate what was practically someone’s entire life story to them— especially when you weren’t sure how much that person could understand. But Pearl suggested they go with the story of how they all met, which left Steven bouncing with excitement and Connie leaning forward in curiosity. Ruby certainly couldn’t avoid grinning at the memories, and soon the story was spilling out of her— about the Sky Arena, the band of rebels, the important and mysterious Sapphire that Ruby couldn’t help but feel shy and nervous around—

And though Sapphire rarely wrote any responses out, she clearly was following. She squawked and chirped and bristled at appropriate moments. She became particularly excited when Ruby described their first fusion; clearly she did have some understanding of it. When Ruby told the part where she’d nearly been shattered, the room had gotten very cold… but when she described those months the pair had spent travelling the Earth and getting to know each other, Sapphire had slowly started to float upwards, scarcely noticing until she bumped lightly into the celling. She only came down after Ruby opened her arms for a hug. She began to hum a quiet tune, one which Ruby joined in with, their voices melting together.  


Everyone else began to drift off at that point. They all had the sense that the pair might want some space. Steven changed into a fresh pair of clothes, and then headed off to the kitchen. He hadn’t been able to each much over the past day, but now his appetite was back, and he was determined to feed both himself and anyone else who might be in want of food. Connie also moved to the kitchen, but found a clear space on the counter where she could take another crack at her trigonometry homework. It didn’t look any more welcoming than it had the previous night. But then Pearl wandered over, and her face lit up. Under Pearl’s careful command the numbers fell into line like troops, the equations suddenly fitting together as Connie found the pieces she’d been missing. 

And so the beach house filled up with warm, comfortable sounds— the turning of pages, the scratch of pencil, the rhythm of a knife chopping vegetables, the grind of crayon against paper, the fizz of frying, the swish of Sapphire’s feathers, Ruby’s low murmur as she continued to retell Sapphire’s life for her.

And when those last two sounds went quiet, it was very, very noticeable. Almost unconsciously, everyone looked up to see what had happened. 

Sapphire had gone very still. She’d dropped her crayon. Ruby was holding her most recent message in her hands, an uncomfortable expression on her face. “You want to know how _this_ happened? How you got this way?” 

Sapphire gave a jerky nod.

Steven, who’d paused in the middle of gathering cutlery, quickly got back to work. Connie, too, ducked her head and stared at the next math problem with greater intensity than was probably warranted.

“Well,” started Ruby. She paused. “We were on a mission. There was this music that broke Garnet apart, and…”

Steven didn’t let himself listen to the rest of it. He was very thankful when the oven dinged a few minutes later.

“Casserole’s ready!” he called, serving it up onto plates. He got a couple prepared for himself and Connie, and while he didn't even bother doing one for Pearl, he got out a third and carried it over to the coffee table.  There he presented it to Ruby and Sapphire. Sapphire sniffed at it experimentally, as if she wasn’t quite sure it was for.

“Sapphire’s never really cared much for eating,” Ruby said, as Sapphire said as she lost interest and returned to her papers. “And I’m not… really in the mood.”

“That’s okay,” Steven said. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I’m sure Amethyst will be more than happy to eat the left overs,” said Pearl.

“Uh,” said Connie. “Where _is_ Amethyst?”

None of them knew. They looked around, and. Amethyst wasn’t anywhere to be seen. And nobody was sure when she’d disappeared, or where she had gone. 

xxxx

Amethyst left the house and stomped down the beach, no idea where she was going. All she knew was that she couldn’t stay at the Temple.

Her legs seemed to know where to go, though. They carried her from sand to wood, along and off the boardwalk, down the city side streets. Amethyst paid no mind to where she was, and so it was only once she found herself standing in front of a curtained off garage that she realised where she’d gone. Vidalia’s house.

Amethyst pushed past the curtain and headed straight to Vi’s living room.

“Amethyst!” Vidalia cheered, the moment she walked in. “Yo! Pull up a chair!”

“Hey, didn’t think I’d see you here,” called another voice, and it took Amethyst a moment to register it as Greg’s. 

Amethyst blinked blearily. The living room was full of humans. Her mind was blanking on the names, but she recognised them— mail lady, arcade dude, pizza grandma, fry man. They were all gathered around a rickety old table, chattering and laughing, holding beer cans and cards.

Cards night. She’d walked in on cards night.

Amethyst stared, and then, without meaning to, started crying. 

She couldn’t stop herself. One moment her vision was blurring, the next she was sobbing, hard and heavy.

Things after that were a blur. The next thing she knew, she was sitting on Vidalia’s couch, something warm being pressed into her hands. She wiped her face on her arm and blinked at it. It was a cup of tea. Hot, milky, with the the tea bag and plastic stirring spoon still inside, just the way she liked it.

The table had been abandoned, the cards left behind (though the beer cans were gone). The living room was empty.

Almost empty. Amethyst became aware that Greg and Vidalia were on either side of her, watching with mingled concern and alarm. 

Amethyst was flushed with embarrassment. She wished she hadn’t come here. She wanted to bury her face in her hands. But her hands were full, so instead she settled for taking a long gulp of tea. The feeling of it searing down her throat steadied her, somewhat.

“Atta girl,” said Vidalia.

“Now,” said Greg. “Can you tell us what’s wrong?”

There wasn’t getting out of it, was there? “It’s Garnet,” she said.

“Oooooh boy,” sighed Greg. “Ruby and Sapphire aren’t fighting again, are they?”

Amethyst gave a snort that turned into a small sob. If only.

And the story came out— but not very clearly. Amethyst kept getting ahead of herself, saying things in the wrong order, tripping over her own words. 

“Okay, hold up,” said Vidalia. “I already knew about Garnet being like, two little lesbians, but what’s this stuff about these monsters you fighting being Gems?”

“Ah… did Amethyst never tell you?” asked Greg.

“Nope.”

“It wasn’t like I was keeping it from you!” Amethyst protested. “It just— never really came up.”

And it hadn’t. Honestly, unless Amethyst was whipping them in the face, she’d barely ever thought about the monsters. The others had explained the truth about them not long after they’d found her, so she’d always known what they were… but she’d never much cared. It hadn’t affected her. It had all just seemed like some cool story. Back then, the only Gems she’d know were Rose, Garnet and Pearl, and she’d been happy enough with that.

She ploughed through the explanation, and cut straight to the chase. “Sapphire’s been corrupted.”

Greg looked stricken. Even Vidalia looked horrified. They opened their mouths to ask questions, but words were already flowing out of Amethyst. “I just… you should have seen here… I never thought it could, y’know, happen to one of us, but now it has, and everything’s terrible and I’ve messed up—”

“Is she okay?” Greg said. “Oh no— did she attack you?”

“We attacked _her_. _I_ attacked her."

“Amethyst—” Vidalia began.

“I didn’t know it was her,” Amethyst said. “She was just some monster, so I attached her… and now she _hates_ me. Steven healed her— or Stevonnie did, whatever— but she can’t stand to be around me! She flinches at the sight of me! She’s scared and I can’t blame her!”

“It can’t be that bad,” said Vidalia. “Why don’t you just talk to her?”

“I can’t. She can’t speak.”

“Wait, wait,” said Greg. “Is she healed her not?”

Amethyst groaned. “I don’t know. She’s like, part way. Half-monster. She barely seems to understand what we’re saying half the time, and she can’t talk. She’s gotta write in _crayon_. Like Steven, when he was _five_. And who knows how long that’s gonna last? Centipeetle lasted less than a day before she got turned back into a giant bug, and…”

It was clear from their expressions that Amethyst had lost them. She took another gulp of tea, then a bite of the spoon for good measure.

The two humans went through some sort of silent conversation over her head, conducted entirely through glances and mouthed words. Finally Vidalia said, “Look, I don’t entirely get what’s going on here, but I know this: you can’t make decisions when you’re this upset. Trust me.”

Greg nodded. “Yeah. Take some time to calm down. We’ll listen, help you sort it out.”

“You can crash here for the night. Sour Cream’s spending the night at his friend’s, I’m sure he won’t mind letting you use his bed, if you want.”

“The van’s always free too.”

“I,” said Amethyst, through a tight throat. “Thank you.”

“No problem,” said Greg. 

Vidalia just rolled her eyes. “Finish your tea. Then you can tell us what happened. From the top.”


	8. Adaptation

Steven awoke, and the cold was so intense that at first thought was that he was back in space.

But no— space was a different kind of cold, the kind of cold that came from sheer utter absence of heat. This cold was intense, but not _that_ intense. It felt like a regular winter sort of cold, like freshly fallen snow and the sharp scent of frost.

But it was only still just October, not nearly late enough for snow. And anyway, even during winter, the frost formed outside his house, not on top of his duvet. Steven could only remember one other time anything like that had happened. It had been in a motel room.

Shivering, he emerged from the blankets, blinking as the shadows resolved themselves into the familiar shape of his loft. Now that he was more properly awake, he became aware of sounds down below— scratching, rustling, a low murmuring voice. He crept to the edge to go look.

Sapphire was down below on the couch. Something was wrong. She was twisting and writhing, her head thrashing. Ruby was with her, trying to hold her, trying to calm her— but clearly not having much success.

“What’s wrong?” Steven said. 

Ruby’s head snapped towards him. Her eyes were wide with alarm and helplessness. “I don’t know. I think— I think she’s remembering something. Something bad.”

Sapphire looked at Steven too, but her single eye was huge and distant, as if she wasn’t seeing him. She snapped her jaw at something invisible. Suddenly her whole body buzzed with light; there was a sound like a recording skipping. When Sapphire’s body resettled, her dress was gone, and she had a tail again.

Steven gulped. He didn’t bother with the stairs— just jumped right down to the lower floor. He almost landed flat on his face. It was hard to think of happy stuff with Sapphire in so much pain. “Hey Sapphire,” he said. “Can I— let me kiss you?”

She didn’t answer— of course she didn’t— but she calmed enough that Steven was able take ahold of her hand. He pressed a big, sloppy, wet kiss onto her gem. Her body flickered once, twice…

… her tail shrank, but didn’t go away.

Sapphire was still now. Still as a block of ice, and just as cold.

“Sapphire?” Steven said. It came out as nearly a whisper.

“She’s…” Ruby began, then shook her head. She carefully picked gathered her partner up in her arms. Even though Sapphire was a fair bit larger than her now, Ruby had no difficulty. “Sorry for waking you up, Steven. We’ll get out of your room.”

“Where are you going?”

In answer, the red stone on the Temple door lit up. The door seemed to burn away, leading into somewhere hot and red. Not the Burning Room— somewhere else, smaller and darker. Ruby’s room, Steven thought. Ruby went into it, carrying Sapphire with her, and the door closed behind them. 

Steven stood there, wondering if he should try and go after them. 

No. Too many ways that could go wrong. Instead he turned on a light and went to make some hot chocolate. And to put on a couple of sweaters.

xxxx

That night Greg slept in his van as usual, though parked in an unusual spot— Vidalia’s driveway. He didn’t sleep particularly well. He kept tossing and turning, and while he didn’t have nightmares exactly, his mind was filled with an ugly sense of anxiety and ill-ease. Around six thirty he gave up entirely and got up. He pulled on his usual shirt, ran a brush through his hair, and wondered about how much of a mess he looked. 

It was nothing compared to Amethyst. Of course, she didn’t need to sleep— but she looked as thought she could really use some. Her hair was disbelieved, her skin pale beneath the purple, and there were heavy bags under her eyes. Greg found her sitting at Vidalia’s kitchen table, blanket hanging around her shoulders and another mug of tea cupped in her hands.

“Morning,” Greg managed. Amethyst looked at him and make a grunt of acknowledgement.

Vidalia was making a bowl of cereal. Greg shot her a look. Vidalia answered his silent question with a shrug. 

Greg wasn’t hungry, put he forced down a granola bar.  Nobody was moving particularly quickly. Greg waited for Amethyst to finish her tea. (Or the liquid part, at least. She didn't bother to eat the bag, which was unlike her).  Once she did, Greg asked, “We going to the Temple?”

“I guess,” Amethyst said. She stretched, got up, and went to leave. She paused when she reached the door. “Vi. Thanks.”

“Anytime.” Vi came over and seized Ame in a hug which would have been bone-breaking in anyone else. To Greg, she just offered a light punch in the arm, and a mouthed ‘ _good luck_ ’. Greg gave her a tight, weary smile.

They set out. It was early, the sky filled with the silver light of dawn. There was a chill in the air, and dead leaves littered the sidewalk. Summer was officially over— Greg would have to pull out his winter clothes soon. Greg considered how he’d reorganise the van to make room while he and Amethyst made their way to the beach.

But he couldn’t stay focused on the sweaters, and soon Greg found himself thinking about Tamika Jones from middle school.

He and Tamika had never been friends, but they hadn’t disliked each other, either. They’d shared a lot of the same classes, and Tamika had always been a friendly face. They’d partnered a few times for experiments in science, and he offered her English notes occasionally. She’d invited him to birthday parties because she was the kind of person who invited everyone. Maybe they could have been friends, but they’d hung out in different social groups, and different interests, and never taken the time to get to really know one another. 

And then Tamika had gotten hit with a car.

Drunk driver ran a red light, if Greg remembered right. She’d broken a bunch of bones and spent ages in hospital recovering. Greg had signed the Get Well card like most of the kids at school, and had wished her the best. Then his Mom had got it into her head that it was only right that he should go visit ‘his poor friend’ in hospital, and dragged Greg over there one Saturday morning. It wasn’t as though he could protest. Greg had brought over flowers and balloons, and been brought to Tamika’s bed for a very awkward forty minutes. Tamika hadn’t been able to speak because of a collapsed lung or something, so Greg had fumbled through one-sided smalltalk for as long as he could, before they both gave up and watched cartoons on the tiny kid’s ward TV.

Heading off to the Temple now, Greg felt the way he had going to the hospital.

Which wasn’t fair. Sapphire wasn’t just some acquaintance from middle school. She was…

Well, technically, she was someone Greg had only met a grand total of three times in his entire life. But she was _more_ than that. She was half of Garnet. Garnet, who’d given him love advice more times than he could count. Who’d saved his life, who’d helped change Steven’s diaper, who played tennis with him on Saturdays…

Greg rubbed his face. Not for the first time, he wished he’d been able to fuse, even just once, so he could have a better handle on the whole thing. Maybe then he’d have a better sense of the boundaries between fusions and the fusers, and wouldn’t feel so confused about the whole concept. 

Greg pushed the thoughts asides as they began the climb up tot he Temple. Should he knock? Usually he didn’t bother, but maybe right now—

Amethyst just pushed the door open and walked in.

Pearl and Ruby were in the kitchen. They weren’t fighting, since there was no shouting or fire or any other hallmarks of a Gem argument. But they were clearly very deep into a… _tense_ conversation. There was no mistaking the low tone of their voices, the clenched fists and dark expressions. At the sound of the door opening the two jerked up, and  seemed relieved for the distraction. 

“Amethyst!” Pearl cried. “There you are! We thought…”

“I was with Greg. And Vidalia.”

Ruby looked at Greg. “So you know, huh?”

“Yeah. I do. I’m really sorry, Ruby… if there’s anything I can do to help…”

Ruby just closed her eyes, looking as though she was trying not to cry. It was startling to see. Greg had seen Ruby cry before— or rather, make tears which had instantly boiled away— but she’d been ranting and yelling at the time. This quiet anxiousness was very different, and it felt almost worse.

“Where _is_ Sapphire?” Greg asked, looking around. “And Steven?”

“In the bathroom,” Ruby muttered.

Amethyst tensed. “The bathroom? Like where we kept _Peridot_?”

Ruby clenched her fists and looked away. Pearl said, “He’s giving her a bath.”

“Why?” said Greg. Gems didn’t _do_ baths, normally. It wasn’t like they needed to clean themselves regularly. 

“There was a bit of an… incident last night,” said Pearl. She paused, as if waiting for some kind of interruption. When none came, she continued. “Sapphire, was staying in the house with Ruby and Steven, but she began experiencing flashbacks. The subsequent temperature drop made her staying uncomfortable for Steven, so Ruby brought her to stay in her room in the Temple.”

“And she was _fine_ ,” Ruby said. “She’d calmed down. Or I thought she had. But then later she panicked again. And then— she ran off—

“You know how interconnected the Temple is,” Pearl said, mostly to Amethyst. “She somehow got into Rose’s room, which lead to the Temple’s heart, and then into your room, Amethyst. She made something of a mess in there. More than usual, that is to say.”

“Yeah, well. Doesn’t matter,” said Amethyst. “Is she okay?”

“We calmed her down,” said Ruby. “And she’s not hurt.”

“But it raises an issue,” said Pearl. “If she could freeze Steven—”

“She doesn’t mean to—”

“I know, I know,” said Pearl. “She’s not in control of her emotions! But that’s the _problem_. She didn’t do any real damage this time, but if she got into the Burning Room…”

Amethyst winced, and Greg grimaced. He’d only been into the Burning Room once, but he still remembered the pit of lava and the sea of bubbled gems hanging above his head. He could only imagine the chaos that would ensue if they somehow all got popped at once. 

“So where are we supposed to keep her then?” demanded Ruby. “Are you saying we _bubble_ her?!”

“No, no, of course not,” said Pearl.

“How about the barn?” Amethyst said quickly. “Peri and Lapis would be fine with the cold, and they only have, like, two bubbled gems there!”

Pearl looked thoughtful. Ruby did not. “Yeah, and what if she runs off? The barn’s not exactly secure. She could fly away and we’d have to track her down again!"

“They’d take care of her! Lapis is really powerful, she’d catch her—”

“Well I don’t know if I _trust_ Lapis!”

That came out as a shout. Ruby shut her mouth, breathing heavily despite not needing to. The air around her was distorted from the heat. 

All Greg could do was stand there. What kind of advice could he give, what kind of consolation?

“Hey guys,” said a new voice. It was Steven. He was smiling, but in a rather weary way. Just over his shoulder something was floating. Some _one_. Sapphire. 

Everyone immediately went silent.

Greg did his best not to stare at Sapphire. It was hard. He’d been warned, but it was one thing to be told she’d been turned into a monster, and another thing to see it himself. Amethyst had said she’d been partially healed— but she also has said that she might revert, and it seemed as though she had. There were very few ‘human’ features left on her body. She was floating in a way which vaguely resembled standing, and there was something dress-like in the way the feathers hung off her. But otherwise— long claw-like fingers, tail, face pointed like a lizard’s…

But she was floating demurely at Steven’s side, had a towel draped around her shoulders, and smelled of lemon shampoo, so she wasn’t particularly threatening.

“Sapphire and I have been talking…” Steven began.

“Talking?” said Ruby.

“Well, she’s been writing,” he amended. “But I think we’ve come up with something. Why doesn’t she stay with Centipeetle?”

Everyone shifted uneasily.

“Are you sure that’s a… good idea?” said Pearl. “I mean, they seemed very happy there on their own.”

“They like it when I visit them, though. And they had fun meeting Connie. I think they'd like a new friend."

“Yes, but staying there permanently is quite a different thing. And the spaceship is very far away from the Temple…

“We’ve got warp pads,” Steven pointed out.

Nobody looked particularly comforted, however. Both Amethyst and Pearl looked at a lost for words; Greg had no idea what kind of insight he could even offer; and Ruby had started pacing. “I don’t want her so far from home, all alone—“

“She won’t be alone,” said Steven. “You can stay with her, if you want, and everyone else can visit her any time they like! And if we need to go away on a mission or something, she’ll have the Peetles there to keep her company.”

Ruby was pulling at her hair. “But the Peetles weren’t even Crystal Gems, we can’t just—” Ruby shook her head, turned, and began pacing in the opposite direction. “I mean what if they— and what if she wants to get out, and we’re not there too help her— she can’t warp like this, we can’t just _trap_ her there—“

Sapphire cried sharply at Ruby’s distress, and floated over to drape herself around her partner’s shoulders. Ruby calmed a little under the weight, stroking Sapphire’s feathers, but didn’t cease her pacing.

Greg scratched at his stubble, thinking. “Sapphire can’t use the warp?”

“No,” said Pearl. “The warp pads can’t recognise corrupted signatures.”

“Then why don’t you give her a warp whistle?”

Everyone looked at him, surprised. After a beat, Steven said, “That’s a great idea, Dad! That way if Sapphire wants to go somewhere, she can!”

“It’s very sensible,” Pearl admitted. “I don’t know why we didn’t think of it ourselves.”

Greg shrugged. He wasn’t surprised. The Gems didn’t exactly have much use for warp whistles— the only reason they’d ever invented them was to help evacuate humans during the war. The only use it had gotten since was by him, on those rare occasions the Gems had felt he might need to signal them or warp away in a hurry. 

“She won’t be able to open the spaceship doors by herself,” Ruby pointed out.

Pearl was thoughtful. “I think I should be able to modify the ship’s systems to give her access. The other corrupted Gems as well.”

Ruby turned to look at Sapphire. “Sapphy… is this what you want? I just want to make sure you’re really okay with this, that you’re comfortable.”

Sapphire chirped and sailed over to the coffee table,where she let go of the crumpled papers she’d been clutching in her claws and grabbed a fresh one. It took a few moments to write out a response. _These other Gems are like me?_

Ruby gulped. “Sorta.”

_Then I want to meet them. And I don’t want to cause trouble here_.

“Sapphire— please, you’re never going to be ‘trouble’.”

Sapphire cocked her head, looking as though she didn’t quite believe that. But she simply wrote, _Let us try_. 

xxxx

“Hello?” Steven called as the door to the spaceship opened. He was greeted by a loud chorus of shrieks. “Hi guys! Awww, it’s so good to see you all! Sorry I haven’t visited you lately— things got a little bit busy. But I have someone I want to introduce to you. She might be staying for a little while. Everyone, come over and meet Sapphire!”

Sapphire poked her head around Ruby’s legs and floated cautiously through the triangular doorway to hover besides Steven. He’d lead her and the others through a hot jungle to this ancient spaceship, covered in tangled vines. The place felt vaguely familiar to Sapphire— not as familiar as the Temple, but she was sure she’d been here before. 

The ones inside— Gems?— also felt familiar to her. Long twisting bodies, dozens of twitching black legs, backs ridged with glittering green, and huge manes of white hair. The scuttled down the walls and writhed over each other as they huddled around first Steven, then her. They were clicking with excitement, staring at her with huge single eyes. 

Single eyes! They had single eyes, just like her! 

Sapphire still felt a little nervous, but she chirped a greeting. They clicked back.

Steven was speaking again. Sapphire made herself focus— language was tricky unless she gave it her full attention. “Sapphire,” Steven was saying, putting one of the Gems’ on its leg,“This here is Centipeetle. Centi for short. And this one here,” he pointed at a slightly thinner one, “is Huggy. And _she_ is Bitey.”

“You gave them names?” asked Amethyst.

“Yeah. I couldn’t just all call them Centi,” said Steven.

Sapphire didn’t quite see why not, but she was in no position to argue. She pressed her snout to each of the Gem’s beaks in turn, greeting them. The touch burned a little— their mouths seemed to leak some sort of vile green spit— but not enough to scare her. The peetles scurried around her, looking her over. It was a little intimidating, but she didn’t sense any hostility, just curiosity. Besides, if things did get dangerous, she knew her friends would protect her. 

As if knowing exactly how she felt, Ruby stepped forward and laid a warm hand on her shoulder. “You okay?”

Sapphire butted her affectionately. Ruby smiled. 

The others were talking, and Pearl was doing something loud with tools, but Sapphire let those sounds wash over her. Instead, she began taking stock of her surroundings. She was in a large green dome, with all sorts of green things growing on the walls. It was mostly empty— there was no furniture or tools or any of the other things she’d messed up when she’d gotten so scared, before. That was good. She felt terrible about all that. She’s just gotten… so, so confused. She’d been seeing things, and she hadn’t been able to tell if it was real, if she was remembering or Seeing things, she’d smelled smoke and heard weapons and she’d tried to run away—

“Sapphire, Sapphire,” Ruby was holding her, shaking her a little. “Are you okay? Is this place scaring you?”

Sapphire shook herself, coming back to the present. _Sorry,_ she tried to say, but it just came out as clicks. She thrashed her tail, wishing she was just able to **talk.**

She couldn’t, but she could write. Steven had brought papers, adding to a stock of crayons and note books that he’d apparently already begun building up in the ship. They were all kept in a corner, crayons in a messy piles while while loose papers were held down by heavy stones. She floated over and grabbed one. _Not scared,_ she wrote. _I like it here._

“Ok…ay,” said Ruby. “But I’m staying with you. If you want to leave, just tell me. Or use the whistle.”

Ruby tugged at the chain she’d hung around Sapphire’s neck, the one which carried the warp whistler. Sapphire reached up and placed her hand over Ruby’s, gently pulling it away, and nodding to show that she understood. 

She settled down on the ground, resting her head on her plume. Ruby settled in besides her. They watched as the others went about. Pearl was still busy doing _something_ to the door, while Amethyst was doing her best to imitate the peetles' clicks. Steven was going around to each of them in turn, placing kisses on their gems. When he did so, their whole bodies glowed; and when the light faded, they looked a little less monstrous. Centi was standing upright, Bitey’s eye had reappeared above her mouth, while Huggy’s front legs had sprouted fingers. 

It wasn’t a full healing, and there was no certainty about how long it would last, but…

It was something. The peetles understood that. And Sapphire knew she wanted to stay. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to make a big shoutout to tumblr user QuixoticQuagsire who did a beautiful piece of fanart of corrupted-Sapphire from the fic: enjoy her in her draconic beauty, right [here](https://quixoticquagsire.tumblr.com/post/150420683543/quick-messy-wyvern-like-creature-doodle-inspired). She makes me so happy <3 <3 <3


	9. Adjustments

The following weeks were strange.  

It was strange, Garnet being gone. It was strange, having her usual silence replaced by Ruby’s booming presence. It was strange, Sapphire being half-healed and living out at the spaceship most of the time. It was strange, with everyone travelling between the Temple and ship every day. 

It was strange, but they adjusted.

At first, Ruby hadn’t wanted to leave Sapphire’s side. She had been terrified that something might happen. She’d worried that the centipeetles might hurt Sapphire, or that Sapphire might hurt herself, or that she’s get scared, or that she’d forget, or she’d revert, or—

But none of that had happened. The centipeetles were quite friendly and got along well with Sapphire, and apart from the occasional playful wrestling match, there was no fighting. And Sapphire did get scared, sometimes— but always Ruby or someone else was there to comfort her. They’d sit with her and hold her and talk to her until she remembered where she was and when she was, show that in the present there was nothing to fear. Those fearful fits got less and less common, and Sapphire seemed to remember more and more, from the stories her friends told her and the trinkets they brought her to help decorate her new home.

And that was part of the reason Ruby started spending less time at the ship.

She wanted to be there for Sapphire, she truly did— and she _was_ there, she reminded herself. But she couldn’t shake the sickening feeling that she wasn’t _needed_. 

It was an old, old worry, one that had haunted her ever since they’d first fused. It had been her fault Sapphire had been cast out; her fault they’d gotten stuck on Earth; her fault they’d been put in mortal danger…

Sapphire— or Garnet— had always seen it another way. Ruby had protected Sapphire; helped set both of them free; given them a chance to be themselves, to join the revolution, find friends and family. Garnet had known, through and through, that she was made of two equal parts. That Ruby and Sapphire were a perfectly balanced team, their love for each other flowing both ways. 

Ruby knew Sapphire still loved her. She was more certain of that than anything. But when she was left sitting around in that old spaceship, watching Sapphire going about her business, Ruby couldn’t help but wonder… Did Sapphire really _need_ her?

After all, they couldn’t fuse. And if she wasn’t Garnet, Ruby wasn’t entirely sure how much use she actually was. 

She was, at least, still pretty good at punching things.

The monster before her was huge, all spikes and teeth. It was big and bulky and angry. It leaked nasty putrid smoke that had driven everyone away from the boardwalk, and left even Ruby gasper. Ruby goaded it on, lead it away from the humans, then took immense satisfaction in repeatedly hitting it in the face _Thwack, thwack, thwack, thwack,_ ** _THWACK_**.  

With one last punch, the monster exploded into a puff of grey smoke. 

Ruby picked the monster’s gemstone off the ground, turning it over in her hands. It was all grey and green, sharp silver lines radiating out from the centre. A Seraphinite. They’d had a few of those in the Rebellion. Had she been a Crystal Gem? 

Something behind her _hissed_.

Ruby bubbled the Seraphinite and turned around to face another monster. Like a snake, but the size of a car, with massive fangs and a spiked tail. It  had slithered up the cliff-face behind her in a sneak attack. Ruby still should have seen it coming. Ever since Jasper had rounded them all up, the monsters had been forming packs. 

Ruby growled, raised her fist, and charged.

But then—

 — it was _blu_ e. 

Blue, and serpentine, and suddenly its spikes and fangs seemed to vanish, replaced with feathers. 

And Ruby swore she saw the monster staring at her with a single eye, huge and round and pleading—

Her gauntlets vanished. Ruby was petrified. The monster kept coming at her, fangs barred. Ruby knew it wasn't Sapphire— but it could have been, it  _could have been_ , and she couldn’t make herself fight against it— couldn’t make herself hurt it—

The monster had no such restraints. All it knew was that this red Gem had attacked its pack-mate, and it was ready to attack in turn. It lunged.

Ruby felt the impact, heavy and sharp, teeth digging into her shoulder. The pain kicked her into action. She pushed the monster off, just enough to get away. The snake came at her again, raising its head for another strike—  

A triple blast of light hit it in the face. 

The snake hissed and recoiled. Ruby shook herself and struggled to her feet. Pearl jumped forward to put herself between Ruby and the snake. She flung her trident, which embedded itself in the monster's chest. There was a flash of light as Pearl summoned a second trident, then ran it through the snake, which roared in pain. With a deft twist, the scream ended as the monster vanished. Within moments Pearl had the gemstone bubbled and vanished. For a moment, she just stood there, savouring her victory, and Ruby saw the terrifying renegade.

Then Pearl flushed with worry, running towards Ruby and crouching down to look her over. “Are you alright?!”

“Fine,” Ruby muttered. She brushed Pearl’s hands away from her shoulder, where the snake creature had bit her. The gouges there weren’t that deep, but she’d gotten far worse. They’d heal in a couple days, no regeneration needed.

Pearl’s mouth twisted. After several long moments of trying to figure out what she wanted to say, she straightened and began, “Ruby—”

“I’m _fine_.” 

“Don’t worry,” said Pearl. “It’s perfectly understandable if—”

“If what? If I freeze up?” Ruby laughed. “‘Course it is. Not like rubies are actually expected to be _good_ at anything.” 

Pearl inhaled sharply. “Don’t say that.”

“Because it’s not true. Because that’s what they want you to think.” Pearl’s eyes were blazing. “Because I know how easy it is to start thinking like that. 

“Besides,” Pearl continued. “I don’t think that’s why you ‘froze up’.” 

Ruby looked at the ground. It was covered with yellow grass. Ruby hadn’t really been paying much attention to where she’d lead the Seraphinite-monster in the fight, but apparently they’d ended up at the lighthouse hill above the Temple. She hadn’t really noticed. She’d been too caught up in the fight to pay attention to stuff like that— relishing the chance to just kick, and hit, and punch, and not to think of anything but the threat right in front of her. 

That’s what the monsters had been for so long: threats. But the sight of those other monsters— blue and slender and scared— reminded Ruby of what they really were. “I didn’t want to hurt them.”

“I know,” said Pearl.

Ruby walked towards and past the lighthouse, to the cliff’s edge. She braced herself against the fence Pearl had built there, taking care not to burn the wood. A cold autumn wind blew against her face. It was an overcast day, the ocean grey and choppy. In her minds eye, she could see the Burning Room, filled with hundreds and hundreds of corrupted Gems. 

“They shouldn’t be bubbled,” Ruby said. “We gotta heal them too. _All_ of them.”

Pearl sighed, and came to stand besides her. “We just don’t have the resources,” she said. “There’s so many corrupted gems, and so few of us to take care of them. And Steven’s powers are still so temperamental. He’s just barely managing keeping Sapphire and the peetles healed. Maybe eventually we’ll be able to help all the others… but right now, we just can’t place anymore of that weight on Steven.”

Ruby let out a long breath. “Right,” she said. “Yeah. Steven. Of course.” She shook her head. “Garnet would have seen that.”

Silence, filled by the call of gulls and a wave crashing far below. And then Pearl said, “Ruby— do you want to fuse?”

Ruby let go of the fence. She stared at Pearl, taken aback. Even Pearl looked surprised at her own words. She twisted her hands, trying to explain herself. “I mean— we don’t have too, obviously— only if— I simply thought… You’re so used to being fused… and it must be very hard for you— lonely, I imagine— and sometimes it helps to get… well, a fresh pair of eyes, so to speak—”

“Pearl.” Ruby held up a hand to dam the flood of words. “Thank you. But it just wouldn’t be… fair, fusing without Sapphire.”

Ruby was a little afraid Pearl would be offended, but she wasn’t. She just looked thoughtful. “I’m not sure if I agree. After Rose… gave up her physical form, I felt similar. The thought of fusing with someone else felt…” She paused, considering the word. “Hollow,” she decided. “But it wasn’t. Rainbow Quartz was nothing like Opal, or Sardonyx—”

“Garnet’s different, though.”

“I know,” said Pearl. “I do. But Sapphire doesn’t want you to be alone. _I_ don’t want you to be alone.”

Ruby was a Gem of restless energy. She was almost always moving— walking, pacing, running, fighting, laughing, dancing—

Now she was almost completely still. Only her lips moved, twitching as though she was speaking to herself, or a part of herself which wasn’t there.

Pearl wrung her hands. “I’m sorry,” she said. “This was a bad idea— I shouldn’t have suggested it. I just… want you to know, that if you need to talk, I’m always…”

She shook her head, turned, and began making her way down the hill as quickly as she could.

“Wait!” 

Pearl stopped and looked back. Ruby’s stillness had been broken to chase after her. “Okay. Let’s fuse.” 

Ruby held out a trembling hand and Pearl took it.

xxxx

The Centipeetle spaceship had gone through quite a transformation over the past few weeks. 

It was no longer just a bare metal chamber covered in in moss and creeping vines. Slowly but surely it had begin filling with _stuff_ , of all shapes and sizes. The corner of drawing supplies had expanded, the paper and crayons being joined by pens, pencils, chalk and paint. Sapphire and the peetles used the supplies not only for writing, but also for art. Taped on to the walls, or else painted directly onto them, were examples of their artwork— perhaps a little crude or abstract, but recognisably depictions of space, of far-off planets, of battlefields and beaches and friends. Steven had stuck up some pictures of his own; mostly photographs of the family. 

There were some things to play with— a beach ball and an old tire, the latter of which was now rather gloopy from acid spit. A couch had been dragged out form Amethyst’s room, stuck in another corner, piled with pillows and blankets, and set in front of a TV. Peridot had somehow managed to get both cable and WIFI in the ship, and with significantly less animal attacks and screaming then at the barn. Television was a big hit. The peetles could spend hours flipping through channels. There were a few old video game consoles, too. Neither Sapphire or the peetles played these much, what with their hands having the tendency to disappear halfway through a level, but they loved watching others play. They were a great audience, screeching and cawing through boss battles, hissing when players died. Sapphire liked to curl around Ruby, purring encouragement. (She tried her best to keep Ruby calm, but was not always successful, as the melty finger-marks on one of the controllers attested to.)

Just now the TV was off, in favour of a more _physical_ activity. The floor was a roiling mass of green and black as the monsters play wrestled. There were dozens of bodies. The peetles— Centi especially— tended to make clones of themselves when excited. Occasionally through the fur and spit a flash of blue feathers could be spotted. Sapphire had no difficulty holding her own. She was fast, experienced, and could just float out of the range of an attack. 

Amethyst and Steven were on the couch, watching. Amethyst sort of wanted to join in— her occasional spars against the beetles had been fun— but she was anxious of fighting with Sapphire around. Steven was just anxious in general.

All the participants had been mostly-humanoid when the wrestling match had begun, having just received a fresh dose of healing spit from Steven. Their forms had deteriorated as the game had progressed. Bitey would lunge; her body would glitch; and her beak would return. Huge would snarl, and suddenly, she’d sprout two new legs. Centi would spit, and her back pinchers would grow larger. Sapphire seemed to grow new feathers every few minutes. None of the corrupted Gems seemed to notice these changes much anymore, but Steven winced each time. 

Hanging upside down off the back of the couch, Amethyst eyed Steven warily. “What’cha thinking?”

“I just don’t get it,” Steven said. “You’d think the healing would get _more_ effective the more I do it, but it just works _less_. It barely lasts two hours now.”

Amethyst let herself drop into a sitting position. “It’s just their bodies, though. Least they still remember stuff.”

Steven grunted. “I guess. I just wish I knew what I’m doing wrong. There must’ve been something I was feeling with those first healings— if I could just figure out what, maybe it would stick—”

“Maybe,” said Amethyst. Steven’s emotion controlled powers seemed like a huge hassle. “But maybe it’s something else.”

“Like what?”

“Well, _you_ didn’t heal Sapphire the first time. Stevonnie did.”

Steven’s eyes went wide. “You’re saying-?”

“Yeah. Fusions are way strong physically. Why shouldn’t fusing make your healing stronger too?”

“You’re a genius!” Steven wrapped Amethyst in a tight hug. She blushed and tensed from the unexpected physical contact, and he retreated a little. “Uh,” he said. “Amethyst— do you want to try?”

“What? _Me_? I meant Stevonnie!”

“Yeah, but Connie’s visiting her uncle, and won’t be back for days. ‘Sides, Smoky’s great!” 

“I’m just not sure if I’ll be much help with this, dude.”

“Isn’t it work a shot?”

“I…” Amethyst looked over at the wrestling monsters, spotting Sapphire in the melee. She was sick of sitting at the sidelines, unable to do anything. “Yeah. It is. Let’s do it.”

This time Steven opened her arms, and when Steven hugged her, it was much, _much_ tighter. An explosion of purple smoke filled the ship.

The wrestling stopped dead. The peetles and their clones rearer up on their hind sets of legs, blinking in confusion and uncertainty. Sapphire rose above them all, buoyed up by a familiar excitement. 

“Hi,” said Smoky, waving a couple of hands. “I’m Smoky Quartz. Nice to meet ‘cha all.”

It was a good thing Smoky had three arms, because they needed that many to shake the many hands and segmented legs that were soon clambering all over them to get a closer look. Smoky laughed, unperturbed. The air was filled with a high-pitched, curious chittering— none of the peetles had known fusion was possible. Or, if they had, they’d forgotten.

Sapphire knew about fusion, though. Once the initial excitement had died down and the peetles had scurried off, she still floated there, the largest of smiles on her reptilian face. 

Smoky met her smile with a grin of their own, but they were rubbing their neck nervously. “Heya Sapph. Remember me?” In answer, Sapphire twined in the air around their head. “I’ll take that as a yes. Stay still for a sec, will ya? I’m gonna give you a big sloppy kiss.”

Sapphire floated to a stuff in front of them and held out a dainty paw. A press of lips and a dollop of spit, and her gem glowed a brilliant blue—

— the light faded, and some of Sapphire’s feathers had turned back into hair. Smoky waited. When nothing else happened, they exclaimed, “That’s _it_?”

Sapphire rolled her whole body in a shrugging motion and made an apologetic noise.

“It’s gotta work better than that,” said Smoky. “It’s _got to_. I’m a _fusion_. Let’s try again.”

They did. Nothing happened.

“Maybe it needs time to warm up.” Smoky spun towards the peetles. “Guys, let me try it on you.”

The clones were gone. The peetles could feel the tension and worry. Huggy was crouched low to the floor, while Bitey snapped defensively at the air. Centi, however, stepped forward, and allowed Smoky to kiss her in the eye-gem.

With a flash of green light Centi’s face flattened into something less animalistic, but that was it.

“No,” said Smoky. “No no no no no no, come on…”

Centi backed away, letting Sapphire come in closer again. Sapphire croaked something which sounded vaguely like ‘ _It’s okay’_. 

“It’s _not_ okay,” said Smoky. “I should be able to fix it, or what’s the point?” They pulled at their hair. “It’s my fault you’re like this, and I can’t even help!”

Sapphire croaked another noise. This one didn’t sound anything like English, but Centi seemed to understand it, because she ran off and brought Sapphire paper and some crayons. Sapphire chirped a thanks and began writing. Smoky had to calm themself down enough to read her message. ’ _Not your fault_.’

“Yes it is,” Smoky moaned.

‘ _Homeworld’s fault_.’

“But if I’d been able to hold my shield for longer… And if I hadn’t attacked you— you wouldn’t be so scared, or in pain, and you could be Garnet, and—”

Sapphire readjusted her grip on the crayon and was considering what to write next, when Smoky began to cry. 

Quietly t first, little tears leaking down their cheeks, but then their face crumpled, the tears morphing into body-shaking sobs. Sapphire dropped the crayon and twisted around them, brushing her feathers against their face. They barely seemed to notice. They just cried and cried.

Words were useless. Writing was too slow, she couldn’t speak, and even if she could, Sapphire wasn’t sure Smoky would listen. So Sapphire tried something else. 

She placed a cold paw on Smoky’s cheek and waited until they looked her in the eye. Then she pressed her muzzle to their forehead with a kiss of her own.

Smoky gave one last hiccupy-sob, then flashed purple as the fusion dissolved. Sapphire draped herself around Amethyst and Steven, and held her family close.

xxxx

 They spent a long, long time with Sapphire. Not speaking, just sitting their, hugging. Eventually, though, Steven said he really needed to pee, so Steven and Amethyst warped back to the Temple. When Steven vanished into the bathroom, Amethyst set off to find Ruby.

Ruby was not normally a difficult Gem to find. You could usually hear her from a mile off. Today, however, she was being weirdly quiet. She wasn’t in Steven’s room. Amethyst checked Ruby’s own room— a low-ceilinged space with a floor made mostly of burning coals, with a single gravel path and a big blue cushion for Sapphire. Ruby wasn’t there either. She wasn’t in Pearl’s room, or Amethyst’s room, or any other part of the Temple either.

Neither was Pearl, actually. Had the two of them gone off on a mission?

No. Probably not. Garnet’s future vision was what had informed them of most of their missions, and with it out of the picture, missions hadn’t been happening lately. All they’d been doing was fighting whatever rogue monsters showed up on the human news or wandered into Beach City.

Amethyst figured she might as well wander into Beach City herself. She probably wouldn’t find Ruby, but she could at least go hang with Greg and Vi until she did.

She was nearly at the boardwalk when she ran into a stranger who wasn’t that strange.

Well, she was strange, in the sense of being obviously inhuman. No human could be that tall, and while lots of humans had black skin, none had skin _that_ black or _that_ shiny.She also had a giant black oval gemstone in her forehead. Amethyst didn’t need a good look at her hands to guess there’d be another stone in her palm. There was a red star in the centre of her chest. 

The fusion didn’t notice her at first. When she did, their eyes— all four of them— widened. Amethyst caught her gaze, gave an awkward smile, and made her way to her.

“Uh. Hi,” Amethyst said.

“Hello, Amethyst. I guess this is our first time meeting.” The fusion extended a hand, but it was far too high for Amethyst to take. Then the whole arm slid down the fusion’s side until it was at Amethyst’s heigh. “I’m Onyx.”

“Cool.” Amethyst gave the hand a tentative shake. Onyx’s grip was firm. “Er… have you existed before, then?”

“A couple times. During the war. Since then, there hasn’t been much need for me.” Onyx smiled sadly. “I’ve been around as part of Sardonyx and Alexandrite, though.”

The resemblance to Sardonyx was obvious. The legs were similar— long, lithe and well-muscled. She had Sardonyx’s triangular face, and the same little gap in her teeth.

But Onyx was different from Sardonyx, too. There were her colours, of course— all dark blacks, purples, blues and reds. Her dark skin shone when it caught the light. Short, purple hair, tied back in a bun with a mauve headband that matched the ribbon tied around her waist. While one pair of Sardonyx’s eyes sat near the forehead, Onyx’s second pair were on her cheeks, facing out sideways. Onyx was not built like a performer, but like a fighter, her clothing plain and her build robust. Lastly, of course, was her arms— only one set, but apparently disconnected from the shoulder, able to slide up and down her torso. 

Onyx demonstrated this as she pulled out of the handshake and returned her arm to its usual spot. They fell into an awkward silence. Amethyst’s neck ached a little from looking up. Onyx adjusted her headband nervously.

“Well,” said Amethyst. “You look good.”

Onyx smile was a little happier this time. “Thanks.” 

Amethyst scuffed her foot in the sand. “It really is nice to meet you. But, actually… I wanted to talk with Ruby.”

Onyx pressed her hands together and tilted her head. “Only Ruby? Or…?”

“Well, I guess Pearl can hear it too. If you’re okay with it,” said Amethyst. “It’s about Steven.”

“Ah. I see.” Onyx sat down crosslegged on the sand, so that Amethyst didn’t have to keep staring up. She nodded for Amethyst to go on.

Amethyst had spent the whole search planning what she was gonna say, but she suddenly couldn’t remember them. “He’s… not too so great.”

“You think so? I know it’s been hard on him, but I thought…”

“He doesn’t want you guys to worry,” said Amethyst. “He thinks you’ve got bigger stuff to think about. And,” Amethyst took a deep breath, “he thinks Ruby’s angry at him.”

“ _What_? Why?”

Amethyst shook her head. “No… not angry, exactly…. It’s just, he thinks it’s his fault Sapphire got corrupted. He’s blaming himself, and he figures Ruby sees it the same way.”

Onyx’s brow was furrowed, her top set of eyes closed. Her bottom set was very wide. “He told you this?” 

“Didn’t need to.”’

The fusion stared at Amethyst until it clicked. “Oh. You fused?”

“Yeah. And Smoky had a good, er, _talk_ with Sapphire, and it helped, but… I think he needs to talk with you, too. Or, well, Ruby, I mean.”

Slowly, Onyx nodded. “Yes… I can see how this might not be the best time for him to meet me.”

Her four eyes closed. A bolt of black lightning, and Onyx was gone. Pearl was left kneeling in the sand, Ruby standing besides her, gazed fixed determinedly on the Temple. 

“Thanks,” Ruby said, to both of them, and she set off.

xxxx 

Ruby felt more clear headed than she had in weeks.

She really hadn’t been sure if fusing with Pearl had been the right idea. But she’d been able to see things… _more clearly_ as Onyx. Pearl’s thoughtfulness, her intelligence, her _love_ , had filled Onyx up, and made the fears and the troubles seem, if not smaller, then at least more manageable.

Ruby knew she tended to have a one track mind. She’d focus on one thing, and then ignore almost everything else. It could be useful, but it could be harmful, too. For weeks now, all she had been focusing on was Sapphire. But Sapphire wasn’t the only person she cared about. Amethyst and Pearl had reminded her of that.

Steven was sprawled on his bed in front of the laptop Greg had bought him. “What’re you doing?” Ruby asked.

He jumped a little. “Ah! Ruby! Hey!” He seemed flustered, but smiled despite that. “I’m watching TubeTube videos.”

Ruby looked at the screen, expecting to see crying cartoon foods or something equally baffling. Instead she saw a video entitled ‘15 CUTEST UNLIKELY ANIMAL FRIENDSHIPS’. True to the description, it showed a cat and a duck cuddling.

“ _Aww_ ,” said Ruby. This was human entertainment that she understood.

She lay down on the bed next to Steven. He looked a little taken aback, but moved over to make room. If he was surprised when she wrapped an arm around him, he said nothing. The video changed to a clip of a cheetah cub playing with a puppy. Ruby and Steven giggled in amusement when the two animals went chasing after a ball, and ended up tripping over each other and rolling into a big heap. 

“You never did teach Lion to fetch, did you?” Ruby asked.

“No,” said Steven. “Lion’s more of a cat nap kind of guy.”

There was a quiet moment of compatible silence as they watched the cheetah grooming itself. Then Ruby said, “I love you, Steven.” 

“Huh?”

Ruby shrugged. “Just wanted to make sure you remembered.” 

“Oh,” said Steven. After a moment, he snuggled a little closer. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, if Pearl and Sapphire were to fuse, their name would be Sard. I'm hardly the first one to come up with this particular play-on-words, but I can't help it, it's too perfect.
> 
> Big thanks to LadyRavenEye who helped me work out what a Ruby/Pearl fusion might look like. The sliding arms in particular were her idea.
> 
> I got the idea for videogame nights in the spaceship from QuixoticQuagsire, who did lovely [this](https://quixoticquagsire.tumblr.com/post/152311622563/inktober-25-art-under-the-cut-as-it-has-spoilers) lovely fanart Sapphire and Centi watching a very frustrated Ruby getting overly invested in a game.


	10. Conversations, Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for anxiety attacks and PTSD.

The night air was hot and humid, filled with distant jungle sounds— rustling leaves, monkey hoots, the drone of insects. The trees were thick, forming a canopy of leaves which went unbroken for miles and miles. Except in this one place, where six thousand years ago a spaceship had landed and crushed everything growing below.

Since then, the ship had been left rusting, vines and roots growing up and over and through its metal hull. Despite everything, trees had not managed to overcome it completely, and the break in the canopy remained. It provided a perfect spot for stargazing. 

On the spaceship’s roof Ruby and Sapphire lay sprawled out on their backs, staring up at the dark sky. For a while Ruby had kept up a running commentary, pointing out which star was which, reminding Sapphire of their names in both Gem and English, how far away they were, how many planets they had, what they looked like up close—

But then she got flustered. She’d never been very good at astronomy, never had a good memory for things. She was sure she was getting stuff mixed up, getting it _wrong_ , she knew Pearl would have known better, or Garnet—

And _besides_. The stars were just a distraction. There was something else she wanted to talk about. _Needed_ to talk about. She couldn’t keep delaying.

So Ruby stopped trying to remember which star was castor. She turned over on her side, looked at her partner and said, “You— you should know. I fused. With Pearl. Yesterday.”

Sapphire stared at her. Her reptilian expression was unreadable.

Then she flipped back over onto her belly, and reached up to the pouch which now hung from her neck on a cord along with the warp whistle. From it she pulled out a notebook and pencil. With Ruby’s gem to provide light, Sapphire wrote out a single word response. _Why?_

Ruby sat up, shifting and sweating. Her… her freakout yesterday felt suddenly ridiculous, stupid. Embarrassing. 

“Pearl asked,” Ruby said, but that answer wasn’t enough, and she knew it. “I was feeling… scared,” she confessed. “And useless. And lonely. So Pearl—”

The temperature dropped, and so did Sapphire’s plume. Her tail lashed. “I’m sorry,” Ruby said. “I’m sorry— I shouldn’t have— are you angry? I should have asked you first—”

Sapphire shook her head. _Not angry,_ she wrote. _Not at you._

“At Pearl?” Ruby asked. “Don’t be. She was just trying to help, and she _did_ help, really.”

Again, Sapphire shook her head.

“Then— then why are you angry?” asked Ruby, frustration leaking in her voice. She hated this, hated the barrier between her and Sapphire, hated how they couldn’t just _know_ how the other was feeling. 

Sapphire was crouched low, the pencil gripped tight in her claws. Frost had formed on her scales. 

“Please, Sapphy,” Ruby said, when minutes went by and Sapphire still didn't write anything, didn't move. “Please tell me.”

Slowly, she did. _Wish I could fuse with you._

“Oh,” Ruby said, soft. “Me too.”

_Glad you have Pearl instead_ , Sapphire eventually scratched out.

“Oh- no. No, it’s not like that.” Ruby wrung her hands. “It wasn’t like— Pearl’s not like— she not your _replacement_. Okay? She’s just… it’s different.” That wasn’t clear enough, but Ruby couldn’t find the right words. She groaned in frustration. “You’re my Sapphire. You’ll always be my Sapphire. Whether we can fuse or not.”

But Sapphire was still so tense, her feathers still thick with frost. Ruby brushed her fingers along Sapphire’s snout, melting some of the ice away. She asked, “Do you remember Sardonyx?”

Jerkily, Sapphire nodded.

Ruby was glad she didn’t have to explain that, at least. There was a lot of history to Sardonyx, and not all of it good. She didn’t want to risk re-opening old wounds, not when they’d worked so hard to help them heal over. Instead, she hoped that Sapphire could remember the— _lightness_ of Sardonyx, the buoyancy, the thrill, the excitement. Hoped she could understand why Ruby might _need_ some of that from Pearl, just now. 

“Do you remember Onyx?”

Sapphire tilted her head.

“Pearl and my’s fusion. That’s her name. Onyx.”

Recognition crept over Sapphire’s face. Holding her paw flat, she flitted it in a tiny wave. It was a gesture which had come to mean ‘ _I remember a little; tell me more_.’

“Okay,” Ruby said. She laid back down, and began idly running her hand through Sapphire’s feathers. Maybe she couldn’t recall the names of every star, but this, at least, she remembered perfectly. “In one of the war’s early battles, Homeworld managed to take Garnet out. When I regenerated, you were gone. They’d taken you. I was—I was—” Ruby shook her head, nearly choked at the memory of fear and panic. “But Pearl was there. And she told me, ‘ _We’re going to her her back_ ’….”

xxxx

The spaceship had become busy place, lately. People were always travelling in and out, playing and talking and chatting and working. Today, it was surprisingly quiet. There were no visitors, and not even Huggy and Bitey were there. They were out exploring the jungle— something they’d been working up to for some time now. After five-thousand years alone in a single spaceship, they’d been understandably nervous about leaving, but they’d been slowly gaining courage, working on making their way farther and farther out into the trees.

That left only Centipeetle and Sapphire. And after some consideration of how to fill this rare alone time, they’d decided to try playing some 'video games'. There were numerous options, but Centi had settled on something she’d seen Steven and the Amethyst play a number of times. Steven had described it as a ‘Fighting Game’, and it appeared to be a very simple battle simulator. You could pick a ‘character’ with set capabilities, advantages and disadvantages, and engage it in combat against your opponent’s character. 

Centi had chosen the character named ‘Lonely Blade’. She’d seen Steven using him, and she liked his big hair. Sapphire had chosen a character named ‘Fury Fist’. Centi could guess why: he was small, dressed in red, and fought with his hands.

The game had been engaging. Enjoyable. It required skill, speed, prediction, _intelligence_. You had to memorise patterns, see how buttons and movements strung together, fight defensively, look for openings—

It brought to mind new old memories— memories of the vastness of space, of a different set of controls in her hands, of the roar of her ship’s powerful engine, of battles and fire fights and—

— and then Fury Fist had come running at Lonely Blade, not in a run but in a roll, a spinning ball of flame—

And Centi hadn’t been in her ship anymore, she’d been in a dark vast plain, and a Quartz warrior had been coming right at her, and— rolling at her— and she had reared up, spitting acid—

When she’d gotten hold of herself again, the TV had been half destroyed. Dripping, melted. Centi had stared at it, and cried. 

It was such a stupid, stupid, trivial thing. Just a simulation, a human game, entertainment—

— and yet, it had left Centi on the floor, shuddering and shaking and spasming, a song screaming in her head, tears streaking down her face, acid pooling around her claws.

Her _claws_. Not her hands, her claws— she’d lost her hands again. And she’d thought she’d gotten used to that, that it didn’t bother her anymore, but she’d been **enjoying** the game, she really had, but now it was destroyed and even if it wasn’t, she couldn't play it because she didn’t even have _fingers_ —

A cold, heavy weight fell around her shoulders, grounding her.

Sapphire was whistling, a soft, soothing sound, a calming rhythm, a counterpoint to the frantic ugly tempo beating in Centipeetle’s head, the one which would rise to a deafening pitch and leave her screaming, screaming, _screaming_ , trying to block it out. 

_I’m afraid,_ Centi did not say. 

_I know,_ Sapphire did not say.

They didn’t need to.

xxxx

With the fireplace lit, a hot cup in her hand, and a warm blanket on her shoulders, Connie felt incredibly cozy. _Amazingly_ cozy. Experiencing a level of cozy she had previously thought could only be reached in holiday specials.

Of course, most holiday specials didn’t have a pile of giant acid-spitting centipedes curled up by the fire. 

Connie grinned to herself. A day in the life at the Universe household.

Though she had to admit… for the Temple, it was unusually quiet. No monster attacks, no explosions, no weird space tech. Part of it was because Steven wasn’t around. Somehow he’d ended getting some sort of part time job at the Funland Arcade as a fake fortune teller, something which Connie found both supremely boring, super silly, and also kind of creepy. (The was _scary_ how much the make-up made him look like an actual robot). Ruby and Amethyst were off doing _something_ in the massive garbage piles of the latter’s room. Pearl had promised to help Connie with her latest mathematics assignment later, followed by some sword sparring, but for now she was busy doing the laundry. 

Connie didn’t mind. She had something else to work on. 

The coffee table was covered in books. So many books, that they’d overflowed to the couch, and even part of the floor. Books, papers, figurines, maps, her laptop. None of it was for laptop, or for training. 

“It’s for _Dungeons and Dragons_!” Connie exclaimed, as Sapphire surveyed the mess and gave Connie a probing look. “It’s a table top game! Not just a board game like those—” Connie waved a hand towards the shelved boxes labeled ‘Citchen Calamity’ and ‘Scruuble’— “But a _roleplaying_ game. My Uncle Ojas introduced me to it, and even gave me a bunch of his old books and things so that I can play myself! I told Steven about it, and he said he’d like to try it, and so did a couple of kids from my school, so we’re gonna get together next week and start a campaign!”

Sapphire nodded, but she still looked puzzled. She floated towards a pile of blank character sheets and leafed through them. After a moment, she wrote out, _It seems very complex._

“Oh, it can be!” Connie agreed. “You need to write a whole story for it and everything. That’ll be my job. I’m the ‘Dungeon Master’. That means I have to make up the whole world— the map, the villain, the threats. Everybody else will make characters with different powers and strengths and stuff, and then they get to make actions, which succeed or fail by rolling dice. I get to guide them and tell them what happens.”

Connie wasn’t sure if Sapphire quite got it yet, but that was okay. She knew the Gems had trouble with a lot of human entertainment, so she was used to it. She settled back down to drawing her map. She had really cool world in her head— vast mountain ranges, dazzling deserts, sweeping fields— and magical floating castles, like the Sky Arenas would have looked in their prime, inhabited by an order of proud paladins—

She had nearly finished her final touches, and was looking up to grab a pencil sharpener, when she found Sapphire curled up on the couch, staring intently at the Dungeon Master Manual. After a moment, she got up to see what Sapphire was reading.

Sapphire wasn’t reading. At least, not anymore. Instead, she had stopped at a full-page illustration. One which showed a band of adventurers— archer, mage, fighter, thief— dwarfed by the rearing form a massive blue dragon. 

Connie’s first thought was that it was a pretty epic picture. Her second thought was that, “Oh… that… looks a little like you, huh?”

Sapphire croaked. Her claws dug a little into the paper. Connie blanched. 

There were arrows sticking out of the dragon’s chest, dripping grey blood. The mage’s hands burned with purple flame. The thief had a whip in her hands. And the dragon, for all its strength and fury, suddenly also looked really scared. 

“Don’t worry,” she said. “You’re a lot prettier than that one!”

Sapphire gave her a dry look.

“Sorry,” Connie said. “But— I mean it. You’re… not like this dragon. You’re one of the _nice_ dragons.  There’s a lot of stories about those. A lot. Seriously, I should bring over the Pern books next time. Or Eragon— it’s not that great, honestly, but it’s about this boy and a dragon who’s name is actually _Safira_. Oh, and you know what? I bet Steven has a copy of How To Train Your Dragon— we could watch it when he gets back— Not that you need _training_ , I mean…”

Sapphire started to make a rasping sound, one which stopped Connie dead mid-ramble. Was something wrong?  Was she angry? Offended? Having one of those panic attacks—

But no, Connie realized. The sound was laughter. Sapphire was _laughing_. 

Still chuckling softly to herself, Sapphire gently closed the book. She briefly rested a paw on Connie’s shoulder, then jumped off the couch. She grabbed the pencil sharpner, then floated down to a spot besides the coffee table. Grabbing a pencil, she tilted her head at Connie in a way that said, _Let’s finish your map._

xxxx

Amethyst was training.

She tried to do it regularly. Once every week, at least; sometimes more. She joined in with Steven, or Connie, or Stevonnie. Sometimes she would even grit her teeth and train one-on-one with Pearl. And more often then not, these days, she’d find herself up in the ruins, alone.

It was boring, tedious work, but Amethyst wanted to get better, and little by little, she _was_. Her running was getting faster; her aim a little more precise; her stances a little more balanced. She’d never be as big or as strong as Jasper was, never be what a Quartz was meant to be, but she could, at least, do this.

Just then she was running drills with her whip. Peridot had built a bunch of ‘battle drones’ to defend the barn, and when Amethyst had asked if she could use some, Peri had been too pleased to ask why. Recycled from the old robonoids she’d sent to Earth, they were spherical robots about the size of soccer balls, which flew around and shot lasers at selected targets. The lasers _hurt-_ but it would take about ten hits from them to force a regeneration. The closest Amethyst had ever gotten to that was seven.

But she’d been getting better and better at dodging the lasers, too. Today she’d only been hit once— and that had just been a graze on her arm. 

It still hurt, but Amethyst ignored the pain as she rolled around the arena, throwing herself off of columns and leaping up the stairs as she dodged lasers. She’d outpace them until she found an opening— then she’d lasso a drone with her whip, pulling it in close enough to flick their off switch.

At the beginning of the session there’d been five drones; now only two were left. One was directly in front of her. Amethyst dodged its blasts easily. The other was behind her, out of sight, but Amethyst could hear it humming as it flew, could hear the warning whine before it fired—

Amethyst threw herself to the side. A blast of yellow light streaked past her as she twirled around and flung her whip around, snagging the robot. Grinning, she began to reel it in.

That’s when, out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Sapphire. 

Her concentration broke, and so did her grip on the whip. It fell to the ground. The robot went flying backwards from the sudden release. The second drone took aim, and fired.

Amethyst got out of the way, but just barely. She felt the blast streak hot, past her cheek, felt it singe her hair. She hardly cared. All she cared about, just then, was Sapphire. Sapphire shouldn’t be there, she could get _hurt_ , the drones were only supposed to attack Amethyst, but what if something went wrong, what if they went after Sapphire, what if—

Putting on a burst of sudden speed, Amethyst raced for the drones’ remote control. Lasers flashed around her as she ran, but not a single one hit before she dove onto the controller and slammed the off button. There were two small _beeps._ The robots switched out of attack mode, and obediently landed on the ground. 

Amethyst sagged with relief. She looked over to where she’d seen Sapphire. She was still there, unharmed and unperturbed. 

Or _mostly_ unperturbed. Her appearance was on the ‘human’ side today— she was probably fresh from a healing. Floating upright, with her ball-gown in place and her feathers falling down past her shoulders, Sapphire looked very regal and composed. The expression on her still reptilian-face seemed calm. But her arms were crossed, and her claw-sharp nails were digging into her skin. Sapphire’s single eye was just barely visible through the bang of feathers, and its gaze was fixed to the ground, where Amethyst’s abandoned whip lay. 

Amethyst made the whip vanish.

“How long have you _been there_?” Amethyst demanded, more angrily than she intended. Sapphire flinched a little, and Amethyst gave herself a mental kick.

But if Sapphire was afraid, that didn’t stop her from floating over and silently handing Amethyst a slip of paper. It said, _We need to talk_.

Amethyst looked at the ground, rubbing the arm where she’d been grazed. She didn’t want to talk. Not about _this_. She’d been hoping she wouldn’t have to. She’d been thinking that after Smoky, she wouldn’t need to.

Apparently, though, she would. No getting out of it. So Amethyst took a deep breath, and said, “Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. I— Sapphire— I messed up. Bad. I hurt you, and I’m really, really sorry—”

Sapphire held out a page from her notebook. It said, _I’m sorry I hurt you too_.

Amethyst blinked. “What?”

Sapphire turned to the note book’s next page. _You attacked me. I attacked you back. I’m sorry_.

“Yeah— but you were just fighting back, and anyway, you didn’t know what was happening—”

_Neither did you_ , the next message began. Amethyst was wondering how exactly Sapphire had managed to write out responses to all of these things ahead of time, when right, yeah, duh. So she just kept reading. _It was a mistake on both our parts. We need to acknowledge that and try to move past it._

“I,” Amethyst began, but then stopped. “Sure. Okay. How, then?”

Sapphire had prepared a response to that question, too. It was a long one, filling an entire page of the notebook with tight, too-neat script. The lines of each letter were pressed deeply into the paper, sometimes so sharply that the pencil had nearly torn through. Clearly Sapphire had taken a long time writing it. Amethyst figured that giving it the time to read through it properly was the least she could do.

_It can be hard for me to tell what is real. Sometimes I have trouble telling the difference between memories and visions. It can be scary, and if I panic, it only gets worse. I’ve been learning to calm myself down, but I need to figure out how to stop myself from panicking in the first place._

_I get scared around your whip. Sometimes I get scared around you._ Amethyst’s grip on the paper tightened. _I know that what you did was an accident, and that you would never deliberately hurt me. But it can be hard for me to remember that._

_I_ _need _ _to remember. There are going to be battles where I will need to fight.When that happens, I cannot allow myself to panic. I need to get comfortable around you, around your whip, and around combat. Will you help me?_

Amethyst stared. Sapphire was afraid she wouldn’t be any use in a fight?

Well. Amethyst knew how _that_ felt. 

When she finally looked back up, Sapphire’s face was taut, as if actually worried Amethyst would say know. Amethyst snorted. Smiled. “‘Course I’ll help.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone. Sorry there was no chapter last week... between a hectic personal life and certain real life events, I was left without much time or motivation for writing. 
> 
> But now we're back! As I've been writing, I've realised I'm lengthening my plan for how long this fic will be (again). This chapter was initially going to cover much more than what's here, until I realized how long it was getting and decided to split it. Plus, I suspect the conclusion is going to take a little longer to wrap up as well. So I currently predict thirteen chapters total.


	11. Conversations, Part 2

Lapis liked to fly.

It had never been a matter of _liking_ , before. It had just been a thing she’d done, like walking or speaking, a simple aspect of her existence.

But now she actively enjoyed it. She liked the chance to stretch her wings, to see new things, to go anywhere she wanted.

(Well. Not _anywhere_. But anywhere on Earth, and that at least was something.)

If it ever felt as though the barn was too small, Peridot too hyper, her own mind too heavy— she could just jump up, and up, until everything shark away below, the earth spreading out like a tapestry of strange colours and lights and shapes. 

She headed in-land, away from the ocean, as she always did. She’d taken this route many times, but today it didn’t feel stale. The weather had shifted recently, growing much colder, and recently the whole land had become bathed in a frozen white film. It was quite pretty, really; everything seemed to sparkle and shimmer, familiar slopes and shapes transformed by the snow. 

There was a sudden cold gust of wind from above. Lapis looked up, and—

“Sapphire?”

The Gem creature trilled a greeting in response, angling her descent to fly besides Lapis instead of above her. 

“Uh. Hi,” Lapis said, trying her best not to sound surprised. She _had_ known that Sapphire had been given free access to the warp pads, after all. But she certainly hadn’t expected Sapphire to be going off on free flights, completely unaccompanied—

But she wasn't unaccompanied, was she? She was with Lapis.

Lapis crossed her arms. She wasn’t sure how she felt about that. Flying was what she did to be alone. 

Sapphire flew on besides her, her long body undulating gently, her plume blown back in the chill wind. She didn’t seem to notice Lapis’s hesitancy.

Is _there really any harm?_ Lapis wondered. Sapphire wouldn’t talk. She wouldn’t bother her. 

And it _was_ kind of nice, having someone flying at her side. It had been a long, long time since she’d been with any other Lapis Lazulis. This was different, of course, but there was something… comfortingly familiar.

Lapis risked a small smile, and the pair carried on in companionable silence. 

xxxx

Peridot needed to get Steven a present.

It was a human ritual. No one had actually spoken about it to her, but Peridot had learned nonetheless. It was snowing. Snowing meaning winter. Humans exchanged gifts int he winter. This was a recurring theme in their media. Camp Pining Hearts had no less the four ‘Hiver Fete’ episodes, and it had shown up in almost everything else she’d read or watched— ‘No Home Boys’, ‘Crying Breakfast Friends’, ‘Buds’, ‘Little Butler’…

It was an Earth tradition, and Peridot was determined to do it correctly.

Besides, it had occurred to her that Steven had already given her many gifts— the tablet, her enhancer cans, her freedom— but she’d never gotten him anything in return. Well, she’d saved his planet, but that didn’t quite seem to count. She wanted to get him something small and personal, wrapped in shiny paper, tied in a bow, which would make him smile and say, “Wow, thanks!”

The problem was she had no idea what to give him. So many of the things Steven enjoyed were still very mysterious to her. And even if she was able to settle on an appropriate gift, there was still the matter of acquiring it. She had ascertained that humans traded goods and services for ‘money’; this was obtained through working a ‘job’; and the entire process seemed laughably confusing and inefficient. 

This required further research.

“So what do _you_ think?” she asked Sapphire.

(She was a little embarrassed about having to ask for assistance in this matter, but as Lapis had pointed out when she’d raised the topic, Peridot did not have a good record with gift giving. So. She was doing what had had to.)

Sapphire raised her head off the barn floor where she’d been resting, and seemed to direct her gaze somewhere behind Peridot. Peridot turned, but saw nothing in particular, just Lapis’s toilet meep-morp installation. “What?”

There was loud clicking noise, followed by something like a sigh. Sapphire drew out her notepad and wrote, _Art?_

“Art?” Peridot said, mystified. Then she remembered having hearing Steven use the word, once. “Oh! You mean our meep-morps! Yes, Steven has expressed interest in them, and he has shown repeated engagement in human media such as music and storytelling… Yes, yes,” she said, her mind suddenly brimming with possibilities. “I could make a meep-morp to him! A tribute to our friendship! Something depicting us and our time together! PERFECT!”

Peridot went off, pacing around the barn while muttering to herself, reciting out the things the project would need. Paint, of course, metal to weld into the appropriate shape, something pink and glittery, something fuzzy, some cans, a tape recorder…

There was a loud clanking sound. Peridot turned towards it, and found Sapphire rummaging around in various spare boxes. When she emerged, she was dragging out a length of brown fabric, just the right size and thickness for what Peridot was intending. She beamed. Further assistance _would_ be appreciated. 

xxxx

It was a quiet day at the car wash.

Granted, most days at the car wash were quiet, and they were only going to get quieter now that winter had officially arrived.  When people got busy wiping ice and snow off of their cars each morning, they rarely wanted to get them _soaked_ in water. 

This lead to some rather dull winter days. Even though he didn’t really need to worry about money anymore, running the car wash was something to do. 

On the bright side, it left more time for music. Greg had been composing a lot lately, experimenting with new sounds and rhythms. Just now he was strumming through his latest piece, trying to think up some lyrics. As he played, a new sound eventually joined in, a counterpoint to the acoustic— a voice, low and melodious. Sapphire sang no words, just pure notes rising and falling in time with his, harmonising perfectly with the guitar.

“Nice,” Greg said, once the song finally finished. “That was _really_ wonderful, Sapphire. Think you’d be down for singing backup when I actually record it?”

Sapphire chirped something that Greg figured was probably a ‘yes’.

“Great. ‘Course, first I need to figure out some lyrics. I’m thinking something about— What’s wrong?”

Sapphire had stiffened and sat up suddenly, her plume erect. Her eye was wide with alarm.

Greg quickly dropped his guitar. This happened, sometimes— she had panic attacks. He had to try to calm her down, keep her there long enough for Ruby or Steven to come. He went to reach out for—

— she shot straight up into the air, screeching. 

“Sapphire!” Greg called—

— And then, up from behind the car wash, rose a monster.

It was huge, with a big bulbous shape like a jellyfish, hundreds of glowing tentacles waving everywhere, pulsing with sinister light. Greg jumped back in alarm, but Sapphire flew towards it, roaring. 

“No! Sapphire, get back here!” Greg screamed. He knew that she couldn’t really be hurt, not physically— but she wasn’t ready for this, wasn’t ready for a fight, couldn’t throw herself at this thing.

Thankfully, she hadn’t _actually_ thrown herself at it. She was keeping her distance, feathers fluffed out as an intimidation tactic. Greg wondered if that could actually work, since the monster didn’t seem to have eyes. Besides, she still looked pitifully small in comparison.

A tentacle whipped out towards her. Greg screamed, and Sapphire dodged.

She was like a blue bullet, weaving in and out of the tentacles, almost too fast to see. She seemed to be trying to make her way to the monster’s bulging head for a proper attack— but there were too many waving arms blocking her way. By chance, one managed to graze her— she cawed with pain, her form spasming with light, her hind legs sprouting claws. She managed to right herself before she hit the ground, but she was shaking. The air had grown even colder from her fear.

Greg stood there. He knew he was useless in monster fights— but he couldn’t just let her take this thing alone, couldn’t just wait for the Gems—

He spotted the hose lying on the pavement. Maybe it would get some use today after all. 

He picked it up and ran for the faucet, wrenching it. The hose rearer in his hands, water streaming out in a big gush. He aimed the stream up at the jellyfish and yelled, “SAPPHIRE!”

Before he even opened his mouth, she dove. She positioned herself just below the stream of water and roarer, just like a storybook dragon. But there was no fire from her mouth: just pure, intense cold. As it hit the monster it froze, its tentacles becoming trapping in ice. It struggled and struggled, but Greg cranked up the pressure, running forward and aiming the hose higher and higher— soon the entire thing was encased. Frozen solid. 

When it seemed safe, Greg turned the water off. Sapphire flew one last lap around it, checking to make sure the monster wasn’t going to break free. 

Greg turned the water off as Sapphire flew one lap around it, checking to make sure it wasn’t going to break free. 

“Nice job,” Greg said, offering his palm. 

Sapphire stared at it. Greg was about to lower it, when she slapped her paw against it in a high five. Greg grinned. 

Then he looked back at the carwash. It occurred to him that he had a giant zombie-jellyfish creature frozen to the car wash roof. He fished out his phone to call Steven.

xxxx

Human cinemas were an… odd concept. 

Granted, almost all human entertainment was rather baffling on some level or other. Strange made-up stories, featuring impossible situations, inaccurate science or ridiculous magic, the same plots, story threads, and lessons, repeated again and again…

It was all very strange, but Pearl had found it had all been growing on her. Once you accepted that none of it was supposed to make sense, it could be rather— well, _fun_ to indulge in. 

The cinema, however, took the idea to a rather different level. It was a building built with the express purpose for large groups to watch films together. It was an old tradition, dating back to their oral storytelling and live performances, but Pearl did not much see why humanity bothered to continue with it now that they all had personalized entertainment devices in their dwellings. They were barred from bringing their own refreshment, but instead required to buy the establishment’s own food and drink at inflated prices. They had to come early in order to secure seats, then sit through a great number of advertisements. Once the film actually began, there was no stopping it, even if you needed to attend to some other matter. Furthermore, it was considered highly rude to make any sort of noise— a frustrating element, since it had always seemed to Pearl that discussion was one of the most engaging parts of the experience.

Despite the ban on speaking, going to the cinema was considered a group activity. This was most likely why Steven approached the Gems asking if they’d like to accompany him to the cinema. Despite everything, Pearl was rather open to the idea. She had been doing her best to try more of these little excursions into human culture.

At least until she asked what they’d be watching, and he responded with ‘The Crying Breakfast Friends’ movie. No human entertainment in the entire history of their species was as baffling as _that_. Pearl had learned to tolerate it for the short duration of an episode… but the thought of an entire hour and a half with nothing but depressed foodstuffs left her shivering.

“You don’t have to see the same movie as me,” Steven had suggested, and ultimately they’d convinced them.

Well, not all of them. Amethyst had said that the movies all looking boring, and anyway, she was going to hang with Peri. Ruby had said she knew herself better than to think she could stay sitting alone that whole time. Pearl had been expecting Sapphire to go off with Ruby— they still spent much of their time together, after all— but she’d admitted to being rather intrigued by one of the films listed, ‘Love Definitely’. It sounded like a romance, and Sapphire was fond of romances. 

“A romantic comedy, technically,” Steven explained while they were getting tickets. The human cashier behind the booth stared at them throughout the transaction, which Pearl thought very rude. 

It rather distracted her from paying close attention to Steven’s full explanation on the differences between the two genres, but he used the words ‘wacky’ and ‘shenanigans’, which did not bode well. 

It indeed did have the amount of silliness Pearl was expecting. Embarrassing misunderstandings, ridiculous costumes, humans having food accidentally spilled all over them…and at certain points, humans attempting reproduction, which left Pearl blushing and hiding her face in Sapphire’s feathers.

But among it all… There was a young secretary working for some country’s president or king or some-such, falling in love despite the difference in their positions. There was a man struggling with the discovery of his husband’s infidelity; a woman coping with the recent death of her husband;a boy about Steven’s age, trying to find the courage to ask out a girl about Connie’s age…

Pearl wasn’t quite sure how, but eventually she found herself crying quietly into her hands, Sapphire gently nuzzling her cheeks.

Despite everything, she was glad she came. 

xxxx

Nail polish, Steven has already decided, is _amazing_.

Okay, it smells really bad, but it comes in so many colours. Reds, blues, greens, oranges, yellows, pinks, bright shades and dark shades, shiny and matte— some of the polishes even have sparkles and _glitter_ in them—

How had he survived the past fourteen and a half years of his life without it?

He has Sadie to thank for the discovery. He’d gone to the Big Donut yesterday, both to buy snacks and deliver Hiver Fete gifts—some video game posters for Lars, and a bunch of old horror VHS tapes he’d found in Amethyst’s room for Sadie. Lars had brushed the gift off (he was still kinda mad at Steven for accidentally taking over his body, so Steven didn’t blame him), but Sadie had actually had something for him in return. She’d given him a big, fancy wooden box with a single pink ribbon on it. It had been heavy, and when he’d picked it up, things had tinkled invitingly inside— so Steven had been so excited he’d opened it up then and there. He’d been ecstatic to find it filled to the brim with nail polish.

“My mom went a little overboard when I had my first sleepover,” Sadie had said, with a sheepish laugh. “These days I can’t really be bothered with make-up, but you seemed to really like it at Beachapalooza. I figure it’ll get more use with you than me.”

Steven had hugged her so hard she’d squeaked. 

Using nail polish was really fun. It was like painting, but for your _body_. You got to turn yourself into a work of art!

Steven was just staring at his newly finished fingers, wondering if they were officially dry enough for him to risk grabbing some food, when he heard the now familiar soft swoosh of feathers. He looked around to find Sapphire settling down on the floor besides him. 

“Hey Sapphy!” he said. “How’re you doing?”

She waved her tail and smile. Then she craned her head to take a closer look at Steven’s hands.

“Do you like them?” he asked. “I couldn’t choose just one colour, so I went with all of them!”

Sapphire took her time, inspecting each nail individually, painted to form a veritable rainbow. Then she chirped her appreciation. Steven beamed.

“I was kind of messy at first, but I think I’m getting the hang of it… I want try it on Connie next time she comes over, but I think I need more practice…” He looked thoughtfully at Sapphire. “Would you like some?”

Sapphire jolted back, surprise written on her face. She pointed to herself, as if to say, _Me?_

“Well sure,” said Steven. “You have nails.”

Technically, they were a little more like claws at the moment. But surely that just meant more space to paint?

Sapphire still seemed reluctant, however. “Oh,” said Steven. “After you paint them, you can’t really use your hands until they dry. That would make writing pretty tough.” He smiled. “Don’t worry about it, then.”

_I can go without writing for an hour,_ wrote Sapphire. Steven’s face lit up.

“Really? You want to try it?” When Sapphire nodded, he practically started vibrating from excitement. “Okay— okay, let me put on some music, and you can pick out a colour, okay? There’s a lot of really pretty blues.”

He busied himself with his phone, flipping through his music collection for the perfect make-up session playlist. Something fun and cheerful, but also fancy and elegant, that Sapphire would like. Once he’d selected something he thought had worked, he turned the volume way up and check to see how Sapphire was doing. She’d already picked a colour. Not a blue, like he’d been expecting, but a deep, rich purple. 

“Perfect,” said Steven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Hiver Fete' is a butchered version of the French for 'Winter Festival', aka 'non-denominational winter gift exchange holiday because Christmas and various other religious celebrations do not exist in the SU verse'. I have no idea how it came about or why, but here are the vague headcanons I came up with:
> 
> 1) there's not a set day for giving presents.  
> 2) though it has been commercialised, traditionally it's preferred for the gifts to be recycled or handmade. (Or, if you can't do that, practical).

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly, I've been intending this story for months. I'd gotten about two paragraphs through a first draft when news of Summer of Steven hit, and I decided to wait until the deluge ended. Which I'm glad I did, because not only would writing more during that period have killed me, but because we now know way more about the Corruption and how it works. The entire plot for this really just coalesced and I'm having a lot of fun writing it.
> 
> ... does that make me a bad person? ;)


End file.
